Today, I was at the bar and my friend and I were making fun of this guy wearing a Affliction muscle tee and bedazzled Ed Hardy hat. We were saying how he was the epitome of a douche bag and that he probably likes UFC. Turns out he's an MMA fighter and I now have a broken nose. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at a local bar, my friends and I were approached by an overly intoxicated man who asked us each politely if we wanted to fight. Thinking it was a joke, I said yes. It wasn't a joke, I now have a broken nose and a black eye. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
Today, I was at a bar with my friend, when I noticed a young lad at a table near to us. I thought it'd be funny to jeer and flick peanuts at him. I went to the restroom, only to come back to my friend face-down on the floor. Turns out the guy fucked him up instead, and now he won't talk to me. FML
Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML
Today, as I was taking the bus home, I sat down next to a man wearing an FML shirt. While snickering I said to him "You totally deserved it." I guess he thought that comment deserved a broken nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML
Today, a few years after getting mugged inspired me to start hitting the gym and taking karate classes, I was mugged again, this time in front of my girlfriend who I actually met at the gym. I was knocked out with one punch. It was the same mugger with the same neck tattoo. FML
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Top comments
CrackhouseDoug 0
YDI for being so judgemental of a person's appearance.
TheNeckbeard 0
Right above the comment box: "Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful." OP should have followed FML's advice.
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Comments (204)
The_Batman 0
Batman could kick that guy's ass
Njtorres 0
whoever is talking shit about Ed hardy is because you can't afford it hahaha and OP you deserved that and more asshole...
Njtorres 0
$10? haha yea sure ill say you won idiot and you keep buying your clothing from those ghetto places hahaha poor ppl make me laugh...
sleepy_headx 0
thats why you dont judge people by their appearance,
chapin345_fml 0
Haha..bully beatdown
will90 5
So just because he wears a T shirt he's a douchebag?
gonebananas18 0
You absolutely deserved this. So wearing an Affliction t-shirt and liking UFC makes someone a douchebag?? What the hell is so wrong with UFC? It's an awesome sport that takes an incredible amount of dedication and talent. And as for wearing Tapout/Affliction/etc... it does NOT make you a douchebag. My last boyfriend wore that stuff all the time and he's not a "rich, white, tough guy wannabe douchebag" or a "muscley, roided up thickneck". He's been doing karate for 15 years and has been training for MMA for 3 years. He's not a douchebag, he simply likes the brands and the fighters. Yes he's in good shape but the point isn't to flaunt that. Wearing those brands is just like football fans wearing a jersey for their favorite player, MMA fans wear shirts for their favorite fighters. That's what you get for judging people based on their clothes alone. And if this guy was an actual MMA fighter, he would be in good shape and it should have been fairly obvious that he could kick your ass. You're ******* dumb to make fun of him.
KingKnob 0
probs not the best idea to go parrading your views about someone looking like a douche bag. YDI
TarasTrouble 0
stop talkin shit just cause you dont dress the same. YDI. and ed hardy shit is sweet as hell and anyone who can pull off wearin his shit is a boss
MajorTom85 0
I'm gonna call BS on this post. I'm pretty sure most people who wear tapout/affliction/ed hardy stuff don't actually train mma. They just like MMA and like to look like they train.
Helldozer 0
So, if you wear a football or basketball jersey it's not because you like the sport and are supporting it, but you want to pretend that you play to impress people? Man, you're a ******* idiot, as the rest of the retards here who attribute wearing an MMA shirt to trying to be "bad-ass" or "pretend to know how to fight." That's like wearing a shirt that has a katana on it to pretend that you're a ******* Samurai. Grow the **** up people this isn't high school (or maybe for some it is), and if that's the case, then you STILL have a **** load of growing up to do.