Intimacy: Today, I've found out that since beginning my new heavy workout...

By Dooh - 17/01/2012 23:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I've found out that since beginning my new heavy workout regime, my testosterone levels have gone through the roof, making me constantly horny. My girlfriend lives on another continent. The reason I'm working out so hard? To impress her when I see her next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 094

You deserved it 5 017

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
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Same thing different taste

Jaded

By not as jacked - 30/04/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I've been an avid gym-goer since I was in high school. A year ago I convinced my girlfriend to start going to the gym with me and she had been sticking to it since. She has now has left me for a full-on fitness model she met there. He helped her start an online store, which is doing well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 122

Health kick

By Anonymous - 05/02/2022 00:01

Today, after my wife set a new rule to improve my health, one sex session for every three visits to the gym, which has greatly improved our sex life for two months, and I've never been fitter, but now she complains I'm not keeping her company on the couch anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 736

You deserved it 185

By anonymous - 24/06/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 695

You deserved it 5 218

Turntables

By Bill Mantie - 18/04/2021 02:00

Today, after months of successfully taking strides to boost my long diminished libido, I found out my girlfriend, who always had a healthy sex drive, has now lost hers. Oh, how the tables have turned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 140

By Anonymous - 22/08/2015 09:44 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my wife accused me of cheating. Why? Because I recently started working out, and according to her, no married man tries to improve his physique unless he's trying to look good for other women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 413

You deserved it 4 650

Leg day

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 02:06

Today, after waiting a year, I asked a coworker who I like to work out at the gym with me. She said yes. I figured this would be the perfect place to show off my body and impress her. In every exercise we did, she lifted more weights than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 2 753

By Nowajerk - 25/12/2011 01:15 - Australia

Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 634

You deserved it 17 641

By mattttbob - 04/02/2012 10:16 - Australia

Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 514

You deserved it 36 010

Side effects

By Anonymous - 10/12/2020 23:01 - Netherlands

Today, I’ve been horny for weeks on end. Because I’m on antidepressants, I can’t orgasm, so the horniness won’t go away. The only thing I do is go to the gym, where literally EVERYONE seems fuckable. While I’m not depressed anymore, my vagina is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 534

You deserved it 174

Work it!

By Anonymous - 21/08/2023 22:00 - Germany

Today, my man said, "If you get more sore from your workouts than from having sex with me, I’m gonna cry!" Uhm… I do serious weight training, and in bed we both enjoy the missionary position, so… sorry for your ego, Honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 145

AmyPacheco 0

Wednesday 18 January 2012 8:44

Well I hope you stay loyal

UsEumYong 4

Wednesday 18 January 2012 8:47

Ohhhh Shes in for a nice visit ;)

Comments

PandasInSpace 0

Wednesday 18 January 2012 21:08

You wanna meet up? (; I'll help you with your problem

thefuckinloser 6

Wednesday 18 January 2012 21:41

good luck with the long distance romance

raaachel12345 0

Wednesday 18 January 2012 21:46

Can someone please explain to me how the **** this is an "FML?" I know I shouldn't question it, but I don't understand. Is the "ooh **** my lifeeee :(" part the fact he can't see his girl since she lives on another ******* continent? Or the fact he's one horny ************? Oh wait...