Today, my man said, "If you get more sore from your workouts than from having sex with me, I’m gonna cry!" Uhm… I do serious weight training, and in bed we both enjoy the missionary position, so… sorry for your ego, Honey. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I realized that my boyfriend of 3 years saying that his back is always hurting to avoid putting in any work during the bedroom Hokey Pokey was his way of saying I’m a lame screw. FML
Today, after 5 years of marriage, my once-gym-mad husband is now so unfit that even standard missionary sex makes him so breathless and light headed, he has to stop in case he passes out. He hasn’t given me an orgasm in over a year and yet he insists nothing's wrong with him, and that I’m just being mean. FML
Today, my boyfriend of four years told me that I appeared to have gained some weight. After realizing that it made me feel depressed, he tried to make me feel better by making love to me. I decided to go with it. While doing so, he paused and said, "I'm sorry baby, but your weight is too much pressure for my back." FML
Today, my muscles are sore in my arm. I told my boyfriend I think I slept on it wrong. Truth is, it's from masturbation. He won't have sex until we're married. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that from now on during sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I need the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML
Today, a few hours after me and my husband had sex, he mumbled, "This is why I hate sex," as he left to grab some Tylenol. Apparently, he's so out of shape that basic sex made his muscles too sore to sleep. This is the first time in two weeks we've had sex. I'm always the one that has to ask for it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML
Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML
Today, I've found out that since beginning my new heavy workout regime, my testosterone levels have gone through the roof, making me constantly horny. My girlfriend lives on another continent. The reason I'm working out so hard? To impress her when I see her next. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
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Top comments
Justkidding100 41
he really expects lying there and taking it to work up a sweat? and for what? next time bench press him up and down and you won't even have to go the gym
1known 31
If you enjoy it great, but if you are both fit maybe you could try other positions… and discover other ones that you’d enjoy.
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 30
Do you lift weights with your ******?
Justkidding100 41
he really expects lying there and taking it to work up a sweat? and for what? next time bench press him up and down and you won't even have to go the gym
1known 31
If you enjoy it great, but if you are both fit maybe you could try other positions… and discover other ones that you’d enjoy.