Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, I told my dad I started taking jiu-jitsu lessons. He responded by laughing and saying, "Martial arts are for pussies, you should just get a gun." FML
Today, I told my dad I want to enlist in the army and he tried to lock me in my room. He did almost the same thing when I told him I wanted to do certain college courses to make it easier to become a police officer, only there was a lot more swearing and throwing of objects. FML
Today, my parents asked if I wanted to go to military school so I said, "Yeah, that would be awesome," thinking it was a joke. They weren't joking. FML
Today, my dad drunkenly ranted about how I should volunteer for the military because of the crisis in the Middle East. I refused; I'm in college on two scholarships and have listened to stories of why his service still gives him nightmares. I had to hide all the phones to keep him from calling the recruiters. FML
Today, my dad found out that I'm a member on a bodybuilding forum and decided to join it too. It's only been a few hours, but he's already told everyone that he's my dad, posted that I'm a "total pussy in real life", and questioned my sexuality. Thanks. FML
Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, I came out as gay to my dad on Whatsapp. The only thing he replied was, "I'll ever talk to you again when you stop being a pussy." He then blocked me from everywhere. FML
Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
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Top comments
lol_ironic_life 9
You being man enough to stand up for your country does not make you a pussy. :) Thank you for wanting to serve and protect us!
EddiE_CN 8
Don't visit him when you are on leave
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Comments (216)
AirborneArmy13B 0
Doesn't matter if you are one. The army will help you, not kick you out if you give it 100%. Serve. It's worth it.
kristina1124 3
Ur cute!
allarmy323 0
They will take u not saying your a pussy but if your healthy and no criminal record. Come on in always nice to have another brother in arms. Just go active best way nowadays. Just don't come to ft Stewart
hateevryone 15
you can still join the military. screw you dad
ScarletBloom 14
I thought they accept ******* as well?
BeepBeepSwerve 9
*****
dhardesty23 8
prove him wrong. I respect your possible decision
darkinners 6
your father was testing you and you failed!! prove him wrong next time
Zeronos 0
Go home and be a family man.
brick_man33 14
father's do know best, go enlist instead of posting it on fml.
mattorama 15
Don't listen to him. Not everyone in the Army is John Rambo! There's more people in support and intelligence roles than on the ground. Military is a good career choice.
spongebob1990 3
I said the same thing to my brother soo he wont join airforce i wanted him to be a marine