Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, I told my dad I started taking jiu-jitsu lessons. He responded by laughing and saying, "Martial arts are for pussies, you should just get a gun." FML
Today, I told my dad I want to enlist in the army and he tried to lock me in my room. He did almost the same thing when I told him I wanted to do certain college courses to make it easier to become a police officer, only there was a lot more swearing and throwing of objects. FML
Today, my parents asked if I wanted to go to military school so I said, "Yeah, that would be awesome," thinking it was a joke. They weren't joking. FML
Today, my dad drunkenly ranted about how I should volunteer for the military because of the crisis in the Middle East. I refused; I'm in college on two scholarships and have listened to stories of why his service still gives him nightmares. I had to hide all the phones to keep him from calling the recruiters. FML
Today, my dad found out that I'm a member on a bodybuilding forum and decided to join it too. It's only been a few hours, but he's already told everyone that he's my dad, posted that I'm a "total pussy in real life", and questioned my sexuality. Thanks. FML
Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, I came out as gay to my dad on Whatsapp. The only thing he replied was, "I'll ever talk to you again when you stop being a pussy." He then blocked me from everywhere. FML
Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
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Top comments
lol_ironic_life 9
You being man enough to stand up for your country does not make you a pussy. :) Thank you for wanting to serve and protect us!
EddiE_CN 8
Don't visit him when you are on leave
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Comments (216)
Ibeatmyself 3
man up fool and join
Rainbow_dumpster 28
Go For it! Thank you for your interest in serving our Country.
XxPieTheifxX 6
join and when you get accepted rub it in his face!!!
tracebarton 0
Was your dad in the military? If not you are obviously a bigger man by joining the military and putting your life in danger and I wanna say thank you for that
idontknowyou123 0
Turn to him and say: At least I have the balls to enlist. Cause honestly most people don't consider enlisting. I'd still be part of the NZ Army if I didn't take a bullet to the leg (no I'm not doing that skyrim meme it really happened to me). And before all you trolls start saying "hurrr nz army doesnt do shit" we served along side your army and marines in afghanistan.
frokeyman92 9
Army takes practically anyone. Training is too easy. Don't listen to him. You can do it!
deadman93 8
Woooah is there a sumbitch on this thread trashing the armed forces of America?
OMGAlf 4
If you want to be in the army then get used to the insult to toughen you up. sheesh.
pike1346 3
Lmao.
icanhazblivions 1
i love how no one is intelligent enough to actually realize what a common comment actually infers. nothing pisses me off more than this, I would have attacked his face for being a sexist mofo. YDI, OP.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Calling someones a pussy is considered sexist now?? But really, WHAT THE **** are you talking about? ...ans how does the op deserves this?