Today, while having sex, my boyfriend admitted to having an affair. To comfort me, he said, "But you have bigger boobs, so you have nothing to worry about." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
Today, I told my boyfriend about how I'm self-conscious about my B-cup breasts. About 20 minutes later, he pointed to another girl with a small chest and said, "See, you're not the only one with small tits!" FML
Today, I was depressed because my boobs are really small for a 20 year old woman. To make me feel better my boyfriend said, "As long as they're bigger than mine." They weren't. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I'd dated girls with smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
Today, one of my boyfriend's friends commented on how small my boobs are. My boyfriend defended me, saying it was only because I was wearing a sports bra. I wasn't. It was the push-up bra he bought me. FML
Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me for six months with my best friend of five years. After asking him what she had that I didn't, he responded with one word - "Boobies." FML
Today, I tried talking to my boyfriend about our sex life. I was trying to express that I feel like we don't do it enough, but he wasn't very responsive. I ended up saying, "I wish you had a bigger sex drive" to which he answered, "I wish you had bigger boobs." FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend had bought me sexy lingerie for our anniversary. However, they're for for a bigger bust. When I asked if I could return it for the right size, he asked me to get a boob job to fit the bra instead. FML
Today, I noticed that I've been gaining some weight. Don't worry, my boyfriend doesn't mind. His new favorite thing is putting my boobs on his head and saying he feels "safe". FML
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Top comments
newbiemalestr8 27
you mean your EX boyfriend, right?
123Puppy 33
I hope you dumped him!
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Comments (12)
Wadlaen 24
Well, it's a great thing to be able to see the positive in every situation...
newbiemalestr8 27
you mean your EX boyfriend, right?
RichardPencil 32
He may be right. You'll have to send me some pics of those boobs so I can render my professional opinion. And in the spirit of humanity in the face of the global crisis, I will waive my normally stiff fee.
jbuckets_404 39
But is that the ONLY "thing" of yours that "wood" otherwise be stiff? [/s; really? This symbol really needs to posted nonetheless i.e., it's NOT self-evident?!]
123Puppy 33
I hope you dumped him!
juggalo2 22
Apparently if he already had an affair, you do have something to worry about, and your boobs weren't big enough. I suggest implants. Or just get a real man.
jbuckets_404 39
Yea, like implanting a functioning, socially-aware brain into said ex-bf's head. Now he (ex-bf!) gets to spend ALL of his time w/ his less-than-adequate (to HIM) side-piece - just like like his "HUGELY" inept cranial/ grey matter. OP, you deserve FAR better - and hope you start looking today!
DonULFonso 22
Tell him not to worry since he's got the biggest penis - the biggest of all... of all of his friends. ;)
rlm2710 13
So u mean he cheated.. an affair is if ur engaged or married fyi (mostly referencing married couples js).
Itsheragain 9
i wouldve said "and your brother was more satisfying but hey, im with you right?"
WistayShlaio82 13
Wow, you have awesome taste in guys
sickerthanyou 13
Well, it’s true!. Even Trump himself said no girl with small boobs can ever be a 10!