By Anonymous - 29/02/2012 16:52 - United States

Today, I rescued a cactus from a lethal fall. It thanked me with a handful of spines. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 410
You deserved it 32 999
When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

emeraldon 7

Yeah, gotta love those lightning quick reflexes and how they come in handy when you really shouldnt have them.

142 8
DocBastard 38

Yeah, those cacti are vengeful *******. Either that or you're an idiot for catching one with your bare hands. While you're at it, would you give my pet porcupine a bath? He's quite tame, I assure you.

73 3

Comments

emeraldon 7

Yeah, gotta love those lightning quick reflexes and how they come in handy when you really shouldnt have them.

142 8
jojoboy 0

Sometimes being the hero just aint worth it

16 0
That0therguy 4

Well it was worth it! Oh, wait. It was a cactus.

8 1
hellbilly205 17

Seems like a prickly situation...

16 9
AnonymousTroll 2

Let the cactus hit the floor, let the cactus hit the floor, let the cactus hit the floor, let the cactus hit the FLOOR!

40 6
Jazzy_babe 2

I don't know what's worse catching a falling cactus or catching a falling knife by its blade??

1 9
RaggleFrock 13

I caught a 3 blade razor whilst it was falling. Ten years later the finger it sliced up still plays up in the cold weather. But then again I also once caught an arrow...with my kn...*boom* *splatter*

25 2
skitzofunia88 8

There's only one kind of cacti worth saving, and it doesn't even have spines. It's called Lophophora williamsii, if you don't know what that is, look it up.

6 6
Cad6 24

It's a ******* cactus. I think you would get more hurt than the cactus. Use your brain OP, YDI.

0 8
zombicidal 11

52 just caught a cannonball with his face

5 1
Darkruler 5

If you paid attention, you'd find that it was the same account, correcting their gender.

4 0
LightningCactus 12

Thank you for saving one of my people with your LIGHTNING fast reflexes, hinting at my name.

2 2
laden_swallow09 34

38 - "I can only count to four. I can only count to four. I can only count to four. I can only count to FOOOOOUR!"

1 5
ShortNotice113 5

The cactus was just showing its affection for you saving its life o.O

0 0
blackheart24 10

1- and how you don't have your reflexes when you do need them.

2 0
mgubi4568 0

Nice catch! Sometimes natural instincts hurt.

32 4
ICATiger 13

When I saw this FML I thought of Splinter Cell the game.

2 1
thiscrazything 1

Yeah, nice catch. Too bad the catchee was so very ungrateful.

1 0
silentbutfunny 0

I thought of a hand full of splinters I landed on one with my hand to stop my fall once. ******* sucked

0 1
Ozuru 11

Looks like someone -takes off sunglasses- was in a prickly situation. YEAHHHHHH.

46 29
blegehlehgleh 0

NNNNNNOOOOOPPPE!!!

39 1
grapist111 4

Or, the cactus wanted to POINT out how much it dislikes you by becoming a little PRICK... No? Okay...

2 0
TheGothGamerGirl 20

Why would you even save a cactus? When I first read this, I thought it said cat. That would be a lot more pleasant and rewarding.

23 5
MrSassypants 33

Why would you save it? Well, I would save it because it is a beautiful creature that needs to be told it is beautiful. I would take a bullet for a cactus. I would hold it in my arms and treat it like it's the only cactus in the world, how a cactus should be treated, I would do many things for a cactus. The cactus, my lover, is a gorgeous thing. Crazy am I? Love knows no boundaries! Say me and the cactus are too young? Love knows no age! Cliché? Cliché love, me, cactus, cliché.

20 1
fistnazal 10

I guess the cactus didn't want to be saved? You can't save cactus's.. Cactus's have to want save themselves

30 4
Torva_fml 16

Cactus's? If only there was a plural for cactus!!! Ooh, wait......cacti you say? Hmm, genius.

16 2
houseofhate0 3

Atleast now you can use your hand as a spikey mace.

11 1
mpsteve137 15

This is like that time I tried to save that porcupine.

17 2
princev3 4

I would go to the local church in I were you. Only someone possessed by Satan would try and save a cactus from a painful death. I go to home depot and buy cacti, just so i can hang them by the bottom and watch them suffer a painful ordeal. You OP are not very intelligent. One time I picked every one of the cacti's thorns out and stuck in back in, pointy end first. Grow a soul OP, murder some plants if you want to be cool.

1 13
The_Troller 14

Ohhhh bad jokes...

0 0
DocBastard 38

Yeah, those cacti are vengeful *******. Either that or you're an idiot for catching one with your bare hands. While you're at it, would you give my pet porcupine a bath? He's quite tame, I assure you.

73 3
The_Troller 14

And make sure you dry him by hand, I've heard that animals don't do too well when sent through the dryer.

13 1
Torva_fml 16

At first I thought you were going to insult people for owning cacti, and was about to go post about how my aunt kills anything that requires daily watering...... But then I finished!.. And realized I agreed with you.

0 6
micahsmommy 13

55 - please tell me all that went through your brain in 2 seconds, 'cause that's a lot of disagreeing and then agreeing for just two sentences.

9 0
DocBastard 38

Sevrandy, I'm very impressed that you're spry, but I'm not sure what that has to do with anything. Obviously my humour doesn't appeal to you, and that's fine. But obviously there are people who do appreciate it, so why denigrate it like that? Does that somehow make you feel better as a person? All your comment accomplished was to make you look like an insecure, jealous ass.

6 0
micahsmommy 13

108 - not only do I appreciate Docs humor, but he stood up for me in a previous post so that earns him my respect. I'm guessing that most people appreciate that he's very honest. If you're an idiot and draw attention to your idiocy he'll call you out on it.

3 0