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  Ali_Br_fml  |  33

wow, stitches from a glass door would have been funny. I had to look at OP's location because I was going to work in New Rochelle yesterday and saw pigeon wings and idk what the other part was, but no body. (obviously it must be dead) It was weird that op had a bad experience with a pigeon in France, and I see a bodiless one on New York... Almost like OP willed it to happen... And I'm not lying. If anyone lives in New Rochelle, it was outside of the Metronorth, near memorial highway before you cross the street, right where all the cabs stay. It may still be there. (excuse my lack of capitalization if I missed 1 or 2... iPods don't fix that automatically)

  UnicornHooker  |  0

I got attacked by an owl once.
She was nesting in my horse's stable, and I, unaware of her presence, unwittingly disturbed her when I was mucking out.
I wasn't ashamed, everybody thought I was like, Chuck Norris for fighting off an owl.

  JesusFishTaco  |  5

I would say that wolverine attacked me after I did an impression of him with Freddy fingers while he watched from behind my back. Then I would say that I hit him in the back of the head with a rolling pin when he flipped me off with his middle claw.