Work: Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female...

By xxx - 03/09/2017 04:29

Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female employee at the office. A little later, I managed to hit her in the face with a door, giving her a bruise. Nobody believes it was an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 648

You deserved it 523

Work

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Same thing different taste

By poop - 18/05/2009 17:25 - United States

Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 619

You deserved it 19 513

By Anonymous - 15/04/2011 00:53 - Canada

Today, during a major argument with my girlfriend, I shoved a door open, which then rebounded and hit me in the face. I'm not sure which is more pathetic: that I was savaged by a door, or that I made up a story about kicking a mugger's ass to explain the huge black eye to my coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 618

You deserved it 36 058

By spreadburger - 21/11/2014 00:29 - United States - Tampa

Today, my co-worker threw a rubber mallet at my face, and I broke my finger in the process of saving my face. She then told me to "take it up with HR, bitch". She's the HR manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 929

You deserved it 2 836

By Anonymous - 03/02/2016 15:06 - United States - Ventura

Today, after a badly misjudged hand signal, I accidentally hit my boss in the face instead of high-fiving her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 215

You deserved it 3 157

By justhatelife - 09/12/2016 14:49 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my coworker got angry at a mean customer. She came to the back, where I work, and started punching the wall repeatedly. When I tried to intervene and stop her from breaking her hand she punched me in the stomach and uppercut me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 304

You deserved it 1 309

By will3000 - 12/01/2011 13:28

Today, I was on my way to work behind a very slow car. At a red light, the lady came over and punched me in the face for following her too closely. We are coworkers and our desks are next to each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 550

You deserved it 4 230

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 038

You deserved it 5 402

By Icci - 12/12/2009 22:54 - United States

Today, at work I was playing football with one of my camp kids in the indoor-pool. I saw a co-worker walking by and I decided to hit him with the football. The football slipped out of my hand and I hit a lady in the face, breaking her nose, and causing her to fall and get a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 693

You deserved it 37 796

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 628

You deserved it 3 475

By OhNo. - 27/07/2009 04:07 - United States

Today, I had a job interview, but I arrived kind of late. I was in so much of a hurry that I hit a woman walking by in the face with the door. I offered to drive her to the hospital. Turns out that she was going to be interviewing me. She didn't offer to reschedule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 049

You deserved it 13 731

Regulate 21

Sunday 3 September 2017 4:53

Hitting someone with a door will usually leave a bruise. Next time just try holding it open until the people behind you take the strain or are completely through.

gobiteme2 34

Sunday 3 September 2017 6:58

A well timed accident no doubt.

Comments

acmariner99 25

Sunday 3 September 2017 4:35

The circumstances do seem suspicious.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 3 September 2017 4:36

Freud says there are no accidents.

Regulate 21

Sunday 3 September 2017 4:53

Hitting someone with a door will usually leave a bruise. Next time just try holding it open until the people behind you take the strain or are completely through.

azouwa 26

Sunday 3 September 2017 11:22

lol you humor me as always.

gobiteme2 34

Sunday 3 September 2017 6:58

A well timed accident no doubt.

08069172894 8

Sunday 3 September 2017 12:08

hello my people s

PenguinPal3017 19

Monday 4 September 2017 9:57

I don't know if I'd want to work with people who thought I'd do something like that on purpose. What kind of terrible people are they that they see this as something more likely to be intentional than an accident?

BohGlam 8

Monday 4 September 2017 13:27

Well, I'd only been working there for a week at that time, so they didn't really now me that well and who wouldn't be a little suspicious/anxious about the new manager. However, of course I apologised and also discussed this at the next meeting and I think we're all good now.