Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I knew micropenises existed, I just never expected I’d see one in person after spending weeks building my anticipation of losing my virginity, getting naked in front of him, then being presented with half a cocktail sausage. Even if we had sex I think I’d still be a virgin. FML
Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
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Top comments
runamile 4
Well no use complaining about it...Next time upgrade to king size if it bothers you so much.
amerwin 3
How have u not seen/felt/tasted his tiny until this point? Have y'all even kissed yet? Its interesting that you would just skip straight to bumping uglies without first coming across his miniature **** at least once.
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Comments (181)
jrod45 0
seriously!! size doesn't matter!!! stop being so frickin picky! if you like the guy stay with him. he's prolly better that the other douches out there.
jeepster7874 0
he warned you lol
Peytonlikesme 0
LOL'ERZ
Primus_fml 0
Why do you put spaces before your punctuation?
cheex87 0
wow. just wow!
pranavrave 0
hey sexy no. plz..............
pyrogirl6622 0
girl if I was you the second I had seen it I would have laughed and said put your pants back on. no woman should have that happen to them.
Bagel09 11
and if I saw you, I would tell you to put your clothes back on because your fat is hanging.
bravesfan112233 0
haha^
marleyvk 0
Bagel win^^
forgetspaces 0
Bagel Destroyed you. Also I enjoy your picture marley. great movie.
chefstar1 0
Ahahhahahaha owned u fat ass
TnscStud 0
lmao^^
Bluepies 24
Most people don't see virginity as whether or not your hymen is broken, but instead as whether or not you've had sex. And like other people have said, it's possible to break your hymen other ways. I wouldn't say an eight-year-old who broke her hymen by falling off a bike is "not a virgin." And hey, you've got an honest boyfriend. That's worth more than a big penis.
thatonedame 6
lol. ydi for not investigating the situation first. if you love him it doesn't matter. or your just a ***** who will sleep with anyone. or maybe you're both too fugly to find anyone else. stop bitching and get a vibrator if it bugs you that much.
justanotherbird 19
Size, in my opinion, isn't that big of a deal. My last bf had a giant sized love-stick, but my current bf is well below average. I was kind of shocked to see how small it was at first, but the way I felt about him made it not matter. Plus, as long as he is good at pleasuring in other ways it's so not a big deal. I will admit though that the bigger one felt more satisfying.
geoLa16 0
wuz it that bad????