By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 01:23 - Canada - Bedford

Spicy
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 998
You deserved it 6 083

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You should give the guy some credit, at least he tried. First time is not always what you imagine it to be.

Look on the bright side. Your sex life can only improve :-)

Comments

You should give the guy some credit, at least he tried. First time is not always what you imagine it to be.

iOceanus 18

I feel sorry for OP because that's pretty bad, but it waaaas only the first time. You know what they say, practice makes perfect ;)

iXTMAstro 6

Well everyone's first time is uncomfortable and hurts. The more you do it, the less it hurts

I'm curious where ANYONE got the notion that the first time is an hour of absolute bliss ended in simultaneaous ******. I don't know any girl that can honestly say her first time hurt like hell, or any guy that can honestly say he lasted like a champion for their first times.

fgwrxfiend 11

My first time wasn't painful at all and was wonderful...well the girl I lost it to was far more experienced than I was so maybe that's why

It's understandable that sex hurts the first time, but I don't get why the boyfriend wanted to use the condom a second time. That's nasty.

So apparently I missed the "didn't" in "didn't hurt like hell"

toddin 7

The first time for girls is usually uncomfortable, but I wouldn't say it always hurts like hell the first time. Personally, I thought my first time was pretty fun, did it hurt? Yeah. Was I sore the next morning? He'll yeah. The initial pain though, all depends on how patient your partner is and how slowly he eases into it. OP didn't mention whether or not her boyfriend was a virgin also, but it's pretty common sense you don't reuse, or try to reuse, a condom, so shame on your boyfriend op.

The first time doesn't generally hurt for guys, 83. If it does, you're doing it WAY wrong.

83- when they talk about losing their virginities and it 'hurting', there usually referring to girls..lol

Not being hatefully or anything, I have a few friends of the persuasion, but I imagine it hurts the first time for the guy if he's gay and taking it... But that's also leaving the realm of "generally speaking"

#116: It depends on what they're doing.. Gay sex doesn't necessarily mean anal. :P

My first time really hurt! Actually my first few times really hurt, it's obviously different for everybody.

Was she the big spoon afterwards too?

Sorry OP, everyone's first time is a doozy

klovemachine 24

I was a two pump chump my first time :( but I have done better since, even lasting over an hour a couple of times :)

zingline89 18

Well I would would expect no less from the love machine

14, a lot of guys can. But the problem is, not many girls like that.

spekledworf 18

24 I second that. Nothing like a chaffing vag...

Might as well wrap his penis up in Saran wrap

klovemachine 24

First time sucks for both men and women usually :( of course I've heard guys brag about lasting longer the first time, but I don't believe them :P Lol @ 20 :D

Not necessarily. If you've spent time strictly on oral/hands leading up to the event (dating for a few months), you become MUCH better at the whole self control thing. It's people who rush into sex that can't figure out what they're doing. You won't be a wiz at doing the deed, but you can atleast get more than 30 seconds in!

That really SEX... Anyone? No? Ok...

Haha I found this joke to be very punny, I dunno about anyone else....

3 and 33 both deserve to be strung up by your vas deferens and/or fallopian tubes.

I just want to rage whenever someone says punny.

That was such a bad pun it took me two minutes just to figure out what you were trying to say...

Oh, I get it. It was a pun. I thought you had a stroke on your keyboard, I'm glad you're okay.

Actually, 91, if they had an actual stroke on their keyboard it would still have been funnier than that extremely forced pun.

Alan2 24

Ok, someone please explain what the pun was. I still can't figure it out after rereading the comment several times.

Alan2 24

OH. I just got it. That was the biggest waste of time

lol that is five minutes you will never get back Alan :-)

SlyFox358 10

Literally took me 10 minutes and saying it out loud for a while to understand. Horrible pun.

Look on the bright side. Your sex life can only improve :-)

alstbv12 13

Sounds like your average first time. Although I think most guys know not to reuse condoms.

zingline89 18

Back in my day we didn't have condoms. We had to use a sandwich bag and a rubber band. Man, you spoiled kids will never know what it was like living in the mid-2000s.

There is a long history behind the condom.

And sure as hell that story has nothing to do with 23's BS story

zingline89 18

I was kidding. I'm aware condoms have been around for many decades.

spekledworf 18

5 My boyfriend likes to leave the condom on for a while after he finishes. He'd keep it on all day if I didn't tell him to toss it

unknown_user5566 26

For the sake of humanity be kidding...

42- apparently, your boyfriend is trying to test a theory by keeping the condom on after he finishes. Long enough for the semen to go through the skin -> make himself pregnant. . Just tell him it doesn't work this way and he'll eventually understand. I guess.

klovemachine 24

This thread is very entertaining :D

september1395 7

23- We're in the early 2000's..... .......we've still got 988 years to go....... ....*awkward*.......

bustub2 8
bustub2 8

42 Q. Why did your BF's condom fly across the room? A. It was pissed off!

spekledworf 18

Guys I wish I was kidding. Continue to bury so no one else has to see this

I find if it's buried, I want to find out what it says even more.

radioedit 7

I remember first tine, sounds just like that

the_smart_way 10

The first tine is the best tine, right?

SlyFox358 10

#15 Please just stop with the attempted jokes. {I don't understand them at all}

Not really, because that doesn't indicate losing virginity. A girl can pop it any other way easily and accidentally.

Tampons. Rough bike ride. Car accident.

Horseback riding. Fingering. And about anything else in life.

Twister can lead to popping the cherry, yes. That game gets everyone so close and hot it'll lead to some fun. ;) Haha. Unless you're doing it with family of course. Twister is good at a party though. Body's so close and rubbing.

agonydrum 7

I think its more appropriately applied as a euphemism rather than a reference to an actual physical occurrence...

dmblonde 13

The first time isn't always that great. You just gotta try again and hopefully figure out how to do it right. Sorry your boyfriend was so stupid about the condom though.

I only got one thing to say to you... Chive on!

Your first time isn't like it seems in the romance novels, it's ususally awkward with a lot of fumbling. You'll both get the hang of it soon enough. :)

My first time was almost exactly like a romance novel ._.

Eww this ******* guy is still posting and taking new pics :/ and every comment is always either annoyingly conceited or just plain dumb. Please just stop posthuman, your disgusting.

I make my comments as conceited or annoying as I please. Just as you make your complaints as displeasing and whiny as you want.

40-So that's your location, huh? Well my back is to a shark tank.