Love: Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 902

You deserved it 6 672

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 659

You deserved it 9 502

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 774

You deserved it 280

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 880

You deserved it 7 257

By hamboneghost - 24/02/2015 19:02 - Canada - New Westminster

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 307

You deserved it 8 857

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 07:35 - Canada

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 830

You deserved it 4 846

By Anonymous - 23/04/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 250

You deserved it 3 798

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 890

You deserved it 10 314

By sneezer - 30/12/2008 04:54 - France

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 159

You deserved it 7 018

Grossed out

By Anonymous - 10/11/2018 14:00

Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 793

You deserved it 345

Poor me

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 03:00

Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 003

You deserved it 242

illmatic2 16

Tuesday 17 August 2010 1:26

Too much tongue?

Crowcaller 5

Tuesday 17 August 2010 1:23

yummy

Comments

Jennifra 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 1:58

66 - Well done hiding your own homosexuality.

soonersbaby21 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 1:58

I'm wondering if she threw up in disgust of him and he's in denial that she's not his gf, or if she was just sick or drunk. I would guess drunk.

awesome_RICKY 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 1:59

YDI! lol u prob had really REALLY bad breath?

marinus_fml 19

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:05

66- I believe you could be the one trying to hide something. anyways OP it's hard to say this, but it could have been worse..

evanizle 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:06

how does any of the information provided lead to the false conclusion that I'm not straight?

minty1807 9

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:08

eeewwww that's gross :L I guess she's a firm believer in 'what's mine is yours' ay hehe x

danowa 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:09

what did u eat before the kiss?

evanizle 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:10

ok how?

superbadd 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:11

use gum next time?

marinus_fml 19

Tuesday 17 August 2010 2:15

how does any of the information provided conclude that OP is homosexual? and needs to cover it up with a bf?

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The Top

Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 457

You deserved it 2 906

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I agree, your life sucks 28 183

You deserved it 47 587

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 31 655

You deserved it 13 247

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I agree, your life sucks 24 877

You deserved it 3 094

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I agree, your life sucks 30 377

You deserved it 2 832

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I agree, your life sucks 24 650

You deserved it 30 713

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I agree, your life sucks 43 907

You deserved it 5 358

Today, Burger King gave me a moldy bun. I noticed 1/5 of the way through the sandwich. My compensation for ingesting mold? A coupon for half-off a Whopper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 813

You deserved it 4 930