Intimacy: Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could...

By jackass - 13/04/2009 10:46 - United States

Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could go car shopping. As she pulled away, I remembered the condom wrappers, sex toy packaging, and empty bottle of rum that was in the passenger's seat of my car. I'm twenty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 852

You deserved it 82 702

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Same thing different taste

The talk

By Anonymous - 12/10/2009 01:28 - United States

Today, my mother had "The talk" with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 331

You deserved it 2 278

Awkward

By Anonymous - 07/01/2012 06:30 - United States

Today, I found out what it's like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 583

You deserved it 7 221

And then.....

By Emmpag - 02/02/2020 01:00 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I bought my very first car that I spent years saving for. A few hours after I signed all the papers, I let my boyfriend go for a test drive. He totaled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 279

You deserved it 796

By Username - 06/06/2011 03:29 - United States

Today, I just bought a car with all of my own money. Then, when I brought it home my dad informed me that my mom will be driving it to work every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 699

You deserved it 4 107

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 022

You deserved it 4 324

By Anonymous - 11/03/2010 23:00 - United States

Today, while cleaning my car, I found my mother's underwear in the backseat. She'd borrowed my car last weekend because hers had been in the shop and she'd been called in to work. I see she put in for overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 725

You deserved it 2 251

By swtkiss1 - 18/02/2009 22:26 - United States

Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 912

You deserved it 58 620

By ummWhat? - 23/12/2018 02:00

Today my car was broken into. The only thing taken were condoms and lighters I had in the glove box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 156

You deserved it 201

By niii - 26/11/2008 04:26 - France

Today, as I often do, I had sex in my old car. I'm 25, my boyfriend is 28 and we're still living with our parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 230

You deserved it 14 043

Privacy

By Anonymous - 25/11/2023 22:00 - Germany

Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170

You deserved it 396

skierguy 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:35

I don't really see what the importance of the "I'm twenty" part is. That would be embarrassing at any age, but by twenty I should think your mom would be OK with you having sex and drinking. If you were 16 that might be a different story.

ambrz 0

Monday 22 February 2010 8:17

Then I'm 20 is important because the drinking age in America is 21 lol

Comments

Art_Vandeley 0

Monday 13 April 2009 21:48

Dude you`r 20 and drive a Mustang? I envy you. I am 20 and drive a Seat Ibiza :(

ivdrscg 2

Monday 13 April 2009 21:51

I don't understand why this is a big deal. I'm 19 and drink all the time, of course, it's legal here in Canada. But I was also drinking at 17 and it was not a big deal. And ohhh no! Heaven forbid your mother knows you have SEX :O NO 20year olds do THAT ...so how is this an FML?

ammali 0

Monday 13 April 2009 21:53

#20, you're a moron. Mustangs aren't real sports cars... because they're muscle cars.

itsTiffany 0

Monday 13 April 2009 21:57

Yeah #4 took the words right from me.

wtfdidido 0

Monday 13 April 2009 22:13

Ya I agree with #22... Unless you are an depressed alcoholic who has sex using condoms with your sex toys.

lyssa_xxoo 0

Monday 13 April 2009 22:17

HAHAHAHA, this made my day. kudos for being an idiot. :)

Fields4mint 0

Monday 13 April 2009 22:31

Because the empty bottle of rum couldn't get you in trouble for having an open container in your car? Yeah, this is a YDI, since you're too dumb to cover your tracks. Moms learn -everything-.

Happy_Enough 0

Monday 13 April 2009 22:33

well like, it's kinda dumb that you left all that in your car when you knew your mom was going to drive it. But the twenty part would make no differance in Canada... so like... say where you're from or the twenty part makes NO sense.

holly_fly 34

Monday 21 March 2016 7:23

It says it on her profile... Why should she have to put she's from the US too?

Roto13 0

Monday 13 April 2009 22:41

I hope she smashes that bottle over your head, because I'm sure it wasn't empty when you brought it in there.

aupilot 0

Monday 13 April 2009 22:54

Well, the fact you mentioned you drive a Mustang when the make/model of your vehicle is irrelevant makes you a douchecanoe (98.7% of all Mustang drivers are douchecanoes...it's a scientific fact, look it up), so YDI.