By Anonymous - 10/07/2012 10:03 - United States

Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML
I agree, your life sucks 21 861
You deserved it 41 322

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Midrash 5

Your nuts...

Expect that when your getting real head. Never rush a woman. I wish I could have sex dreams, if only I had imagination...


Midrash 5

Your nuts...

Cant tell if this is a pun or a bad 1st comment


Bonzer 2

10- you can't even spell it right.

10- I'm thumbing you down purely because you think Coldplay sucks.

perdix 29

Well done! I'm giving #1 the benefit of the doubt that he intentionally used the double-entendre of "your nuts" and "you're nuts." Even if it's just an accident, it's still as funny as ****!

Midrash 5

22 gets it..

MrBrightside21 20

#1 Obviously meant to use that clever, witty pun... Making him the weiner of clever puns.

16, Coldplay does suck

61, says the one with the sketchy profile pic.

ThisIsMyReign 4

Could be worse. Could have been on camera. XD

Want to know how I know you're gay? Cuz you listen to Coldplay

I think everyone who replied to this comment COMPLETELY missed the fact that the person missused the form of your. It should be "you're nuts". As in "you are" nuts.

Midrash 5

122 - u clearly don't full get the pun.

122- "you are" slow.. We already went over this...

Midrash 5


winnerme123 8

Your nuts what? ..... Hurt?

Agreed 87. 61's profile picture looks like the love child of the slenderman and rudolf the red nosed reindeer.

Next time dont push so hard :)

Lovers5411 3

well im assuming its a bad first comment being it should be "you're nuts" if he wants to make a pun lol

my_two_cents 3

It was a good pun #1. Too bad most people who comment on this site are morons. I laughed.

Fail attempt at first comment....

Add more thought to your next comment

Ok then fail attempt at second comment

If that's your comment, why say anything at all?

PandaKitteh 20

Just GTFO -_-'

p3mguin 7

TXT language and out of context comments are forbidden! Now you get the **** out!

zachattack112492 4

Successful troll is successful

Grootensliven 10

Man you really get into those erotic dreams, actions and everything

22cute 17

Why o why would you push on a woman's head while she's giving a ********? Do you want to make her gag or bite you? That's a good way to do it.

Yea why do alot of guys do that??

To make her go deeper because it feels good. It's not rocket science.

jvillan87 5

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

It's because it happens in ****. No other reason. 186- if you want her to go deeper you could just ask. It's not rocket science.

it was a dream. Do you ever act consistently in dreams?

... you like having vomit all over your junk? Weirdo.

Expect that when your getting real head. Never rush a woman. I wish I could have sex dreams, if only I had imagination...

Yep. OP is a perfect example of a guy who watches too much **** and believes that's what real intimacy is... I'm pretty sure most woman, outside of ****, dislike having their partner grab their head and try to jam it in further.

nofearjenshere 12

There's nothing worse than having your head pushed down when youre trying to do your man a favor. Thats when you stop and make them go down on you instead.

sinkmyanchor 0

I don't see why it's a big deal, some people are into rough stuff like that.

55, believe me, I know about people wanting it rough. I am a definite masochist. The amount, and severety, of the bite marks currently on my torso would make most people cringe. But the act of grabbing a womans head and forcing her to deep throat you is an act teenage males learn from watching a lot of hardcore ****.

55 - Some people also enjoy scat, but you wouldn't just assume they are and take a crap on them; you ASK if they're into that first.

rudegirlmania 10

42's comment unnerves me, with her age taken into account...exactly how long have you been doing this? O.O

If a girl doesn't want to deep throat a guy she shouldn't be forced. It just feels like we're choking and for me, makes me want to throw up (damn gag reflex)

eddyg94 11

This, as with most arguments on FMLife, is a matter of opinion, and sexual activity is probably one of the greatest dividers of opinion of all time. Newsflash guys, some people prefer different things to other people.

70: Was wondering the exact same thing, especially since boys her own age don't really qualify as "men".

While I can understand that some, and probably most people do not want to have their head pushed down while giving head, it was a dream. So why does the OP deserve to be hit in the balls for a fantasy?

twisted_cherub 14

SkoomaKi, I don't have sex dreams, either. But it isn't lack of imagination. It's that my subconscious hates me. In my dreams I get to the point where good stuff is about to happen, then flash forward to getting dressed when it's over. As for pushing her head down: Speaking as a woman with a strong gag reflex--bad move! Ask before you get rough, always. Of course, this doesn't apply to people in dreams. There, you can do anything you want. Unless you're me and you want to participate in the steamy bits of your sex dreams.

77 - Probably because he attempted to push dream-girl's head with so much force he actually HURT himself.

HentaiBunny 4

I think it's a turn on to have him directing. You want to do what he wants you to do for him to feel good right? I mean, we don't give head so that we feel good, its for him.

Your a ******* weirdo skook. Like wtf. Just share that shit with all of fml you perv

twisted_cherub 14

As established many times, it's more about the force with which he did it and how that would potentially hurt a girl. Also, most women can't get something shoved into their throats without gagging. He wasn't just directing, he was forcing. 82- I do it for me. It turns me on like no other foreplay can. But I have a strong gag reflex so he lets me stay in control, and he still gets plenty of enjoyment.

I just fell in love with HentaiBunny :O

82, oral isn't all for the other partner from anyone. I, like the other person who mentioned it, get turned on a lot while going down on a girl. I think of it as getting pleasure out of giving pleasure. Though I'm curious, do you not have a line between being led and being forced? You can lead a horse to water, but when you drown it, you no longer have a horse.

Lunachic91 6

You took the words right out of my mouth. How can anyone be held responsible for their dreams?

redmane 21

wetFeline - Asshat.

HentaiBunny 4

Well no, I'm not saying the girl doesn't get any pleasure from giving head, it's stimulating, but the main concern of a ******* is to please the man. That's what I meant from "for the guy."

twisted_cherub 14

Drigr- LMAO, literally! Great analogy. A thumbs up was not enough to express how much that made me smile. And, just so you know, I'm going to repeat that to my friend. She'll love it.

118: You seem like a girl who's down for anything, no matter what gets rammed down her throat. Sup?

This is why we have gag reflexes, so guys learn quickly not to force girls heads down to hard. Once they do it to hard once, lesson learnt.. Unless his a complete idiot that is, and doesn't learn from his mistakes..

82- best analogy ever.

148, If you didn't have the gag reflex you probably wouldn't need to worry about having your head pushed down in the first place...

dissention 4

Drigr, technically you'd still have the horse. On topic, idk I've been told to pull hair, push on her head, and all other types of weird shit. Some chicks are freaks and like it rough.

70- I'd say most girls I knew when I was 17 had gone that far with a guy. Most has lost their virginity by then and I didn't have a particularly slutty group of friends. It's not that weird.

I know there are a majority of woman who the that but I've been with a couple of girls who love it and beg for it. Soo..... You guys can't speak for the everyone :)

asianswag 6

That sounds pretty nutty if you ask me

yesyesnonono 10


You guys are driving me nuts.

couldnt have said it better myself

I'm gonna go ballistic if you guys don't stop!

BrysGirl27 14

Hahah sounds like a lovely dream;) with a not so happy ending

At least he didn't come all over his sheets

At least he didn't come all over his sheets

I'd rather cum on my sheets than punch myself in the nuts

Ow. Started reading the fml and guessed that he would do something like that. Sorry OP, that sucks.

Yeah, the girl too.

Rofl I'm laughing so hard right now! But I'm sorry to hear that happen I know that really hurts:(

OP, never give up!! If you **** up a wet dream, be a trooper and wake up and finish it.

That means your probably gay

Yes because only straight guts love blow jobs.

jayfreeman80 0

What exactly makes you think a guy dreaming of getting blown by a woman is gay?

His subconscious trying to remove his real feelings

and how is that?