Today, I had a horrible breakup with my girlfriend of two years. Depressed, I changed my Facebook status to, "Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn't do for you." My ex commented, "Give me an orgasm?" Five of my friends, including my mom, liked this. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me over Facebook. Unfortunately, she "accidentally" posted it on my wall instead of sending me a message, so the whole world could see it. My mom liked her post. FML
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
Today, when I logged onto Facebook, I discovered a friend request from my ex who broke up with me and deleted me months ago. Upon adding her, I was taken to her profile where I saw dozens of status updates talking about how much she loves her new boyfriend, who she dumped me for. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me on my Facebook wall. 27 people liked it. FML
Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML
Today, I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed and I noticed my boyfriend had commented on a post. It said, "Tag the hottest girl you know". Yeah, he tagged his ex. FML
Today, my girlfriend "accidentally" set her relationship status to "single", and 20 of my friends "liked" it, including my mom. FML
Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML
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Top comments
catchyscreename 0
Oh. DAMN you totally walked into that one.
andyn 0
YDI for posting lyrics as your facebook status you ******* twat.
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Comments (233)
lmmmr 0
YDI YDI YDI YDI YDI YDI 1. For listening to terrible, terrible music. 2. For wallowing in self-pity on facebook. You sound so incredibly lame. Your poor ex girlfriend.
Me27 0
Yeah, YDI for doing the trendy-lyrics-as-statuses thing.
blueworld_fml 0
Your girlfriend is awesome. YDI for not getting her off...it isn't THAT hard. YDI for wallowing, too. This is probably EXACTLY THE REASON she broke up with you. As for your Mom, well, I really don't know...
Me27 0
YDI for doing the whole trendy-lyrics-as-a-status thing.
SirAwesome 0
YDI it for 1) using facebook to whine and 2) being awful in bed. Seriously, read a website or something, it's not that difficult to make 99% of girls cum (the other 1% might have a medical problem).
Nightfallz 0
ydi for using bad song lyrics to express your feelings on failbook.
toxickittenxo 0
yeah she's a bitch -.-
dELiA14 0
Omg it mom is MEAN!
hayride1987 0
HAHAHAHA well at least now you know why it did not work out between you two...
shad0wpuppetz 0
That's some emo bullshit you pulled on facebook.