Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML
Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML
Today, my wife was in labour and bouncing on her inflatable ball to relieve the pain when it popped. This thing has lasted her entire pregnancy and it chose to burst now, sending her crashing to the floor groin first while 8 cm dilated. And as the husband, it is of course all my fault, you bastard. FML
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML
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Top comments
Grimmerie 31
Impregnate her.
XxHoPPoxX 8
Balls to you
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Comments (260)
rebamoo 14
Bahaha is your username from idiocracy?
rebamoo 14
I just have to say that there is SO much more to childbirth. There's the entire pregnancy - 9 months of different forms of terrible pain and/or sickness almost every day and night. You have to count the labor, which can be LONG or short depending on the pregnancy. I was in horrible labor with my boys for 40 hours and 30 hours, but I've heard of much longer (and some women are immune to the epidural). Each hour the pain getting worse and worse. But as soon as childbirth is over, we have the immediate responsibility of caring for the equivalent of a paralyzed, starving, drunk person with hardly any break for months on end - while healing from pregnancy, labor, and childbirth. What happens after a man gets kicked in the balls? Depending on how hard the kick was, he's in pain for a measure of time. From minutes to hours (not sure but has anyone felt it for days?). And then he's normal again. I'd say the woman's pain lasts longer, and IMO, long lasting pain is worse than a short (in comparison) burst of pain. OP, I'm not sure why your GF kicked you in the balls for saying childbirth hurt more! I have to say that is weird. Maybe she was trying to get you to agree with her? Some people HATE to be wrong. But good for you xD
TCKM416 15
Flashback to the last episode of friends