spekledworf
United States
Today, I got pulled over. Suspicious that I'd been drinking, the police officer made me walk a straight line and recite the alphabet. I failed both. I was completely sober. FML
Top comments
xviem 0
that's what you get for being a dumb ass
Katie_the_Great 6
You sir... Fail
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Comments (363)
xviem 0
that's what you get for being a dumb ass
bravesfan112233 0
go back to second grade and get coordinated
poiuytjfffc 0
Osama's dead dead dead dead dead way to go America. woohoo what are you gonna do now?
pertained 12
They didn't account for handicapped people, did they?
sterlingarcher 1
lol ydi!
robbiboyo 0
I can't say the alphabet backwards and I broke my foot in highschool and can't really walk a straight line.
mfmylifesrsly 29
LOL I failed walking in a straight line after 2 beers :/
Hotlanta 5
damn talk about being a lightweight! I bet they were light beers to like bud light or something along those line. hahahaha amazing
rrrmmmvvv 0
#50 the op said they were completely sober so how are they a light weight??
mfmylifesrsly 29
lol it was coors I think
clarkie_boi_8494 0
you must be one of the special children
Hotlanta 5
I was talking about #40 and she got it so that's all that matters.... not that hard to figure out who I directed that to..
Uncool_LikeYou 0
60- just stop. you're embarrassing yourself.
Hotlanta 5
oooh snap #61! I knew it was a light beer. Count it!! lol
clarkie_boi_8494 0
62 you're so hot
rrrmmmvvv 0
lmao sorry!
Hotlanta 5
haha no worries #71
MC18 0
And you don't know your alphabet how?...
GeneralGreivous3 0
I can understand not walking in a straight line but not being able to recite the alphabet? People like you amaze me.
sterlingarcher 1
haha wow that's pretty sad
yaer 4
go buy yourself "alphabet for dummies". very good book full of explainations.
beccusmaximus 0
Um, 82, you do realize that that is Darth Maul in your profile picture, right?
GeneralGreivous3 0
Yes I am perfectly aware of that.
beccusmaximus 0
OK, just checking. I love Grievous as much as the next gal, but Darth Maul is probably my least favorite villain. I was confused by your profession of love for Grievous, yet lack of matching profile pic.
GeneralGreivous3 0
Really? I think Darth Maul is cool, but not as awesome as Grievous.
littlemissFYL 5
lemme guess - ENEMENOPE?
brenz1126 0
143- N-N-N-NERRRDGASM
staceysgenesis16 0
so it was basically a test proving your stupidity at the wrong moment .. ur a dumby mistaken as a drunk .. good job
xXSillyLoveXx 0
Xviem, you're calling OP the dumbass? dumbass is one word, dumbass.
kcluna 6
Can you even spell your name?!
tsim_fml 0
178- 'dumb' and 'ass' can be two separate word as well. Get ur shit str8 before you correct someone else who isnt actualy wrong.
sterlingarcher 1
lol people's comments are better than the actual fml!! haha
uncbballwins 0
I swear to drunk officer I'm not god
1greatsk8er 0
208 haha I say that all the time
whitesox365 0
officer, id like to take the breathalyzer please
corrinaswan 0
I rather spell dumb ass wrong then not kno my abc's lol
sephoraprincess 7
dayyuum dude you even drunk when you're SOBER!!
clarkie_boi_8494 0
maybe you would pass if you were drunk....
melbadelb 0
I thought they made you recite the alphabet backwards . under pressure like that in my opinion would be hard to do.
sterlingarcher 1
haha that would suck ^^
dgr8ing 0
try he was nervous out of his mind!!! let's see you do it dingus
kyarush 10
if your sober don't do any sobriety tests. or do the breathalyzer. if the cop is smart he will tell you to bail. cuz if he takes you to jail and you blow 0.00 you'll have yourself a law suit.
Jeremiah92 0
OP: A B C D...something something Z Cop:....
noboundary 9
lmfao!!
GrooveSponge 0
Maybe OP was extremely nervous? I've heard a lot of stories where the people were in fact sober, yet they get so frazzled that they manage to mess everything up.
theUBERcomment 1
what seems to be the officer, problem?
xXSillyLoveXx 0
Compound word? Welcome to grade 1!
richard121212 0
screw u if don't like earth maul.
mystifisvt 4
Lmao, earth maul.
shadexilmaendu 4
They do make you recite the alphabet backwards, I thought that was pretty common knowledge unless they do those drug education programs differently now o.o but idk about the rest of you; I cant do my backwards abcs sober... o.o
c_bell18 2
Lmao win.
bradleybaldwin 9
Asshole
Katie_the_Great 6
You sir... Fail
manMadeFAIL 7
your dads condom was a fail OoOoOo
damselchelle 4
not really. this sort of thing happening is not uncommon. there was a survey and most admitted to being unable to recite the alphabet backwards. what do we do when this happens? especially on account of the drivers who become awkward/bumbling fools with unneccesary nervousness when in the presence of the po-po. well it has been agreed, on many occassions, that a simple breathalyzer would suffice.
cgchamp89 7
it said recite the alphabet. Not recite the alphabet backwards.
Predental 5
Biggest fail of the year
jayalexander 7
biggest most epic spectacular fail of the year
urdirtyolduncle 15
41- I respectfully disagree. Katie The Great is quite cute and therefore, her dad achieved great success after the condom failure. Your comment, on the other hand, is a fail since it got thumbs down :(
amadais 1
if you were drunk you wouldnt be in this mess.
leeshxx 3
133, that's not her. that picture is on google..
OMG_N3RD 0
I agree with 53 ive seen that picture bunch of times on photobucket
KingDingALing 9
41 - Are you seven years old or something? First off, you can't say "oooo" to your own joke and secondly, the fact that you said that "joke" makes me believe you were actually serious, which in turn makes me believe that you truly are mentally disabled. Jesus Christ, people will never learn...
zp5 4
41 Is a fail.
urdirtyolduncle 15
*gasp* I've been google fooled on FML!!
urdirtyolduncle 15
I agree with the dog cleaning the back yard!
AyeCarlos 0
Katie don't fake pics I've seen that pic everywhere xD
Mitcha857 0
wow op really did fail, hard!
IsH3092 0
this is a win
packerjake 0
wow u wish that condom could fit you
ImTotallyAsian 0
Katie that is still the same person!
Sir_Audric 0
Couldn't have said it better myself lol
Pinguini26 6
No, you didn't. No adult would fail to walk in a straight line or recite your ABCs. Fake.
shadexilmaendu 4
I wonder how many chicks on here are using fake photos of themselves... o.o
Chris9154 6
good thing only the breathalyzer mstter
sterlingarcher 1
lol
sgtrobswifey 0
Actually, you're statement is incredibly false. The whole process of a DUI or DWI is taken into account. The only test that can not be argued is a blood test. those unfortunately are typically only done when the investigation is do to a traffic crash. ANYWAY.. :|
sloppyflow 1
good thing op thought he was sober. he thought.
klutzyduck1 24
#181, Actually you are wrong. Yes, you can refuse the breathalyzer and lose your license for a year through DMVs Implied Consent. Yes, you can refuse SFTs as well. Neither of these two things will prevent you from being arrested, taken to jail and lodged. And yes you are permitted to have a blood test, but it will not and does not have to happen before you go to jail. Police Officers are not required to take you to get your blood taken and you will pay for it yourself.
sterlingarcher 1
lol seriously who cares????
SchiTzenGiglez 0
194 very true. the only thing is that if you already been charged with a DUI and you refuse a breathalyzer you will be in way more trouble. if you refuse a breathalyzer on your first offense it's better than getting a dewey. if you refuse and you have a record you'll get ****** for refusing
JManHobbs 0
204 - People that don't know the law deserve it when they get locked up on a bullshit charge. Care.
sterlingarcher 1
hmm ok yeah that makes since ^^
Asario 0
i have the feeling you guys have been pulled over a lot if you know these laws by heart. see, most people would just figure that drinking + driving = no. but i applaud you for your knowledge on the topic.
sterlingarcher 1
231 ive never gotten pulled over haha :)
Asario 0
congrats! we need more drivers like you on the road 232 :)
sterlingarcher 1
238.. woo hoo! lol : D
klutzyduck1 24
Or perhaps they have jobs that require a complete understanding of certain laws and policies---just a thought though;).
sgtrobswifey 0
Or perhaps, I'm the one doing the pulling over..
OUfan08 0
Seriously? How old are you? You can't recite the alphabet? Wow!
Hotlanta 5
ha haaa wow!! maybe you shouldn't have dripped outta school at the age of 6......
Hotlanta 5
dropped** not dripped sorry
iRCassxD 0
They're old enough to drive and they can't recite the alphabet. This amazes me.
Predental 5
he probably meant recite the alphabet backwards
Takador 3
Some one failed their ABD's...
toastyjustice 5
honestly I don't thinking could say them backwards when in sober
vonfupchickrn 0
you do know that when your pulled for for a possible dwi/DUI they haw you recite the alphabet back wards which most people can't do
brenz1126 0
98- "when in sober"? wow, it sounds like you're pretty fitshaced right now buddy :)
sgtrobswifey 0
Actually, 152, they don't. If they do, they'll likely have their case thrown out. which makes for pissed off sa, which makes for pissed off brass, and the shot rolls down hill. At least for the past 6 years they haven't been taught to do that. All sobriety exercises are standardized. Also, they're not tests.. we aren't testing you.. we are watching you fail miserably at a standard exercise.
xchica365x 0
so I'm guessing you're a cop?
Angi95 3
Yet they can type an FML I dont believe I think it's a load of bull.
deadlymerc 0
178 some of the things they make u do i cant do sober... ive tried. and i could find anyone that could do it. and ik that its from a sobrity test cause i watched it happen. and what the cop had them do was keep their right foot 6 inches in the air parallel to the ground with their left index finger on their nose while looking up into the cops light and answer a series of questions
MrSassypants 33
it's easy ___________________ zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba
DreaminOfMusic 0
it doesnt even say it has to be backwards though, op must just be really dumb!
MrSassypants 33
oh dang it! I just put my brain to use for no reason :(
Miss_Michaela 10
Can I ask, is it Mr Sassy Pants or Mrs Assy Pants?
DreaminOfMusic 0
Omg good question!! makes me wonder too!!... weird...
da_baddest_2011 0
hmmmm ???
urdirtyolduncle 15
5-- great illustration!
MrSassypants 33
MrSassyPants but I get people confused cuz I didnt put a capital S :( Ill get a pic that says MR.
Miss_Michaela 10
Or, put your title as Mr.
GabbyCharityM 0
I believe its Mr.SassyAss Pants
DeadxManxWalking 27
must have been tired or something
comepoopwithme 0
ya tired of thinking
valri3 0
No it's just that OP was so drunk that OP thought she was sober.
DreaminOfMusic 0
hahaha sounds like something that would happen to me!
bellacullenisme 0
lol me too, I can't ever walk in a straight line
SaraBOO716 0
Awe that's sad! Maybe you should go back to school :)
mozeltov 7
moron
smile1992 0
obviously you didn't get an education
CateXOX 0
I don't remember having a kinky-texting class in school.
CateXOX 0
Oh shit I'm going to get hammered for this one.
KiddNYC1O 20
Apparently, neither did you.
Death_From_Above 0
apparently you don't remember your reading before commenting class in school
smile1992 0
yes because you know me so well?
Monjara 4
Just as you know OP so well to say he didn't get an education.
smile1992 0
its funny how you idiots care so much about my opinion
smile1992 0
why do you care? get a life