Transportation: Today, I drove home in my brand new car, hoping to surprise my...

By Badnewca - 14/05/2009 06:07 - United States

Today, I drove home in my brand new car, hoping to surprise my girlfriend. She came out the house laughing, saying how funny it was, and how I look like a "twollop" in it. Then in all seriousness, she asked me when I was getting my "actual car" back from the garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 153

You deserved it 5 227

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
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Same thing different taste

Never cross the streams

By caughttt - 10/02/2010 02:52 - United States

Today, I drove my ex-boyfriend home from dropping his car at the garage for new tires. On the way, I drove past my house where my boyfriend was sitting in the driveway ready to surprise me. My boyfriend watched us drive by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 260

You deserved it 43 682

By suckstobeme - 16/04/2009 18:38 - United States

Today, I asked my girlfriend what her favorite quality about me was. Her answer, "Your car." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 140

You deserved it 8 803

By Anyom - 27/07/2016 00:46 - United States - Detroit

Today, my friend got her first car. I bought mine 3 weeks ago and haven't started making payments. She came straight from the dealer ship to pick me up. She backed in to my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 644

You deserved it 967

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 643

You deserved it 39 067

And then.....

By Emmpag - 02/02/2020 01:00 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I bought my very first car that I spent years saving for. A few hours after I signed all the papers, I let my boyfriend go for a test drive. He totaled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 291

You deserved it 808

By theoriginalkydd - 11/12/2018 07:30 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I met up with my ex-girlfriend for coffee. It’s been months, and I was planning on flexing on her with my new car. Turns out, she also got a new car, and it’s newer, cleaner, faster, and better on gas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 108

You deserved it 3 631

By ac13 - 27/06/2010 18:03 - United States

Today, I called my boyfriend to tell him how excited I was to drive 12 hours to see him and his new house. His girlfriend answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 031

You deserved it 3 793

By crashednowcrushed - 26/04/2009 00:44 - United States

Today, was my 16th birthday and I was supposed to be surprised with a new car. I have overheard my parents talking about bringing it home tonight while I was at a friend's house. We snuck back to my house to see them bring my car home. All I saw was my Dad crash my new car into a street lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 348

You deserved it 14 853

Bollards!

By Anonymous - 20/05/2024 16:00 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I proudly drove my new car to work, feeling on top of the world. As I parked, I noticed everyone in the lot staring at me. I smiled and waved, thinking they were admiring my car. It wasn't until I got to my desk that my boss informed me I'd dragged an orange traffic cone under my car the entire way to the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 535

Lies and love don't mix

By Gregoree - 16/04/2022 00:01

Today, I borrowed my mom’s BMW to impress my new girlfriend. I'd told her that I owned an accounting firm, so I had to look the part. Today was also the day someone decided to rear-end us. That someone happened to be my boss at Burger King. Let’s just say, the cat’s out of the bag and I’m single now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 184

You deserved it 3 015

metallakes 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 3:54

that would be a noun...

immafiremylaser 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:09

What's a twollop? Is it a kind of fish?

Comments

xxmollyxx 25

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:07

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

lbumbblebee 5

Tuesday 19 July 2011 7:15

what a waste of first comment smh...

immafiremylaser 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:09

What's a twollop? Is it a kind of fish?

fezzaza 0

Thursday 25 March 2010 2:53

Twollop- (adjective) a douchey loser who drives s gay car

metallakes 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 3:54

that would be a noun...

starlover77 0

Saturday 19 March 2011 18:25

lmao

Felling 14

Thursday 23 May 2013 17:31

According to Urban Dictionary, a dirty twat. xD

HurriKaty 4

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:09

Run her over with it.

VegasMade702 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:13

Yah WTF is a twollop?? Is that some crazy british slang for douchebag???

googlefrewdnoob 0

Sunday 2 October 2011 8:02

The FMLs from Texas, retard

paintedchocolate 30

Wednesday 20 February 2013 16:00

So what? OP's girlfriend could still be of British origin.

driscoll1985 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:13

It might be that you look like a trollop in it because its such a manly car and your just no beefcake enough to pull it off!!!!! I doubt it though. Women are strange either way. Just have to say I look better better than you in and out of it - your a lucky girl!!

jonnyBgoode 9

Saturday 1 September 2012 1:22

Uhm, what?

Xx_Slayer_xX 22

Tuesday 28 April 2015 21:55

You're* for one, and two. You don't have to come in making douche bag comments that don't even need to exist. But hey, whatever. I'll deal with it.

redbluegreen 40

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:13

Sucks. Especially if you like your new car.

tick_tock 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:14

#2 Haha I agree, what is a twollop? Is that a British word? According to urbandictionary a twollop is: A word (noun) that defines a stupid person, used by young people. "hey, look at that guy over there. He's a twollop!" Anyway that sucks for you!

llamatrauma 5

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:14

i'm pretty sure it's "trollop." what kind of car is it?

Dukedj 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:17

I' m guessing you got a girly car? Or the type that maxes out at 83 mph lol?

chabz_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 21:15

but then how will we get back to the future?

azurewave 6

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:02

Nos

Cheatx 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 12:18

Tell your girlfriend you need another driver to get your old car back, drive to a deserted place, and kick her out of your car. Then be like "Whose the twollop now?"