Love: Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time.... - FML

By husks - 12/04/2011 04:08

Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 110

You deserved it 12 424

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

Sweet relief

By Anonymous - 17/06/2016 03:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 613

You deserved it 1 561

Sorry

By RaveCharlie - 18/04/2013 22:47 - United States

Today, I had to break up with my girlfriend twice. Apparently, the first time she thought I was kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 541

You deserved it 7 141

By .... - 24/12/2013 02:48 - United States - Modesto

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 065

You deserved it 3 726

By EpicFail - 25/01/2009 04:25 - Canada

Today, I got a text message saying "I'm sorry, I know it's our 4 month anniversary but it's not working out, I need to break up with you" followed by her complaining that I never call her as well. WTF? I haven't had a girlfriend for 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 282

You deserved it 2 717

By Anonymous - 24/09/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 790

You deserved it 13 636

Her revenge

By Anonymous - 25/02/2020 22:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 702

You deserved it 768

By Anonymous - 13/05/2015 17:20 - Canada - Qu?bec

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 942

You deserved it 2 772

By Anonymous - 12/12/2013 21:53 - New Zealand - Napier

Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 401

You deserved it 3 505

By ddll - 05/09/2011 01:27 - Singapore

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 306

You deserved it 12 324

By Anonymous - 22/02/2013 10:25 - United States - Winter Park

Today, I walked 6 miles to see my girlfriend. After 5 and a half miles, she broke up with me because I never visit her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 659

You deserved it 3 952

Next

Top comments

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 12 April 2011 11:52

Does Hallmark make a "I dumped you, bitch! Move on!" card?

NuyoRicanGirl 3

Tuesday 12 April 2011 11:45

then don't talk to her anymore :-/

Comments

rustyute_21 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 9:59

obviously you haven't either...

jleep 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 10:19

then stop taking her back genius

Nitial 6

Wednesday 13 April 2011 14:03

Was her name Rose?

TexasCountryFan 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 14:12

haaaaahaha creepers these days, providing entertainment for those not being creeped on :)

hosson 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 20:52

u haven't gotten the hint if u have broken up with her 5 times. ydi

heydere 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 5:15

she's a keeper

rainbowsncrap 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 5:47

i dont think you have if you keep getting back together with her

Jerslilwifey 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 7:00

Lol. i think the op means he's tried to break up with her 5x and she still thinks they're together! i'd try to make a chart, with pictures. lol. sorry guy!

kylepwn1 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 7:17

go up to her and splash a cup of liquid in her face or just slap her. u don't deserve to have a crazy bitch with her jaw deathgripped onto your ankle your whole life

vde_fml 15

Thursday 14 April 2011 16:55

Stalker much :_)

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The Top

Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to initiate group sex and figured I just needed to be talked into it. I was so mad, I couldn’t throw everyone out fast enough, including him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 980

You deserved it 174

Today, I had to text my landlord to tell him I’m gonna be short on rent. The guy who mugged me last night took the money I made from tips that was supposed to complete my rent. He replied, “Wow that’s wild. I don’t know how you’re gonna come up with the rest by 11:59 tonight, or you’re evicted in 30 days.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 125

The Top

Today, I was on my way to meet the girl I like at the beach. I parked my truck and walked to the restaurant where I was supposed to meet her. She wasn't there so I called her and she told me she cancelled because it started raining. There wasn't a cloud in the sky. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 705

You deserved it 3 072

Today, I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska are in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 961

You deserved it 5 311

Today, it's the fifth long-term boyfriend I’ve dumped because I want to be a mother but they didn’t want to be fathers. In fact, the last one laughed in my face and told me he’d be willing to get a cat, because cats require less effort than dogs, and don’t interrupt his PS4 time after work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 484

Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 335

You deserved it 16 582

Today, I learned there are people who will beat you up if you don't give them your spot on a bench. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 560

You deserved it 320

Today, I was kayaking with my family for my birthday when we tipped over while going down a rocky cascade. My husband badly cut up his arm, and my car keys and my phone both went for a swim and never returned. Great birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 461

You deserved it 8 668