Work: Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an...

By Anonymous - 19/04/2014 01:19 - Norway - Mo I Rana

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 595

You deserved it 7 451

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Same thing different taste

Nightmare fuel

By Traumatized - 12/03/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, at my job as a hotel housekeeper, I accidentally entered the room of someone who hadn't left yet. To my horror, the man inside was having a massive heart attack. I just found out he passed away, despite immediate medical intervention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 79

By Crap - 12/04/2016 16:48 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 821

You deserved it 2 953

Death Rattle part 2: Electric Boogaloo

By 0h_Boy - 04/03/2020 18:00

Today, at my job in a funeral home, I was transferring a body off a stretcher when it exhaled its last breath. Right into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 891

You deserved it 167

By janedoe - 12/02/2009 22:21 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91 796

You deserved it 12 740

By no name - 22/06/2013 07:20 - United States - Gaylord

Today, while working at my job at a nursing home, I slipped and fell. It wouldn't be so bad if it was just water. No, one of the residents had just had an "accident". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 752

You deserved it 3 833

By mrdentist - 02/12/2010 13:20

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 836

You deserved it 5 536

By guy - 30/07/2012 03:24 - United States - Avon Lake

Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 152

You deserved it 5 795

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 02:24 - United States

Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 760

You deserved it 2 490

By Anonymous - 03/06/2015 10:15 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 962

You deserved it 3 118

By aragmir - 18/12/2016 06:10 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station and figured I could sneak one out. It wound up being very loud, and I could hear the faint snickering of a patient in the next room. Every time he saw me for the rest of the day he would burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 697

You deserved it 2 869

Welshite 39

Saturday 19 April 2014 16:23

Silent, but deadly.

Thorvald22 17

Saturday 19 April 2014 16:22

Good god man what did you eat?

Comments

SparkyRoxYurSox 16

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:17

Lmfao.. Achievement unlocked, deadly blast from the past.

sinistral 10

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:34

this sounds like ur trying to make everything about you.. attention seeker much?

stickingems 9

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:43

Sorry ! :(

stfudonnie 10

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:58

well there is worse ways to go out

Ben009 13

Saturday 19 April 2014 18:17

The silent assassin

Thaboman1 4

Saturday 19 April 2014 18:55

You deserved it at 666. Just saying...

mannatee 19

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:01

Shouldn't really joke about death

leary96 15

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:03

"I don't subscribe to coincidence" -Hannibal

scottyspot 11

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:05

Leave no witnesses to your super powers of poo.

vlalam 24

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:08

RIP :(

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I found out that morning after pills don't work if you're already ovulating. I also found out that I might become a father wayyyy sooner than expected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 545

Today, after weeks of stealing lunch from one of my employees, he made a sandwich with canned cat food, soap, and something unimaginably spicy that caused me to spew all over my office and laptop. I fired him. Now everyone is treating me like a monster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51

You deserved it 2 137

The Top

Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 773

You deserved it 4 322

Today, while trying to sneak out of my house to go to a party I met my mom trying to sneak back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 664

You deserved it 8 305

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 190

You deserved it 3 669

Today, I found what I assumed was my laptop, though my mother has the same one. As I opened it, I was greeted by a video of my father waving. He wasn't using his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 753

You deserved it 4 917

Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 205

You deserved it 3 277

Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 729

You deserved it 170

Same thing different taste

Nightmare fuel

Death Rattle part 2: Electric Boogaloo

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