Work: Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an...

By Anonymous - 19/04/2014 01:19 - Norway - Mo I Rana

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 595

You deserved it 7 451

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Same thing different taste

Nightmare fuel

By Traumatized - 12/03/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, at my job as a hotel housekeeper, I accidentally entered the room of someone who hadn't left yet. To my horror, the man inside was having a massive heart attack. I just found out he passed away, despite immediate medical intervention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 79

By Crap - 12/04/2016 16:48 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 821

You deserved it 2 953

Death Rattle part 2: Electric Boogaloo

By 0h_Boy - 04/03/2020 18:00

Today, at my job in a funeral home, I was transferring a body off a stretcher when it exhaled its last breath. Right into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 891

You deserved it 167

By janedoe - 12/02/2009 22:21 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91 797

You deserved it 12 740

By no name - 22/06/2013 07:20 - United States - Gaylord

Today, while working at my job at a nursing home, I slipped and fell. It wouldn't be so bad if it was just water. No, one of the residents had just had an "accident". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 752

You deserved it 3 833

By mrdentist - 02/12/2010 13:20

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 836

You deserved it 5 536

By guy - 30/07/2012 03:24 - United States - Avon Lake

Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 152

You deserved it 5 795

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 02:24 - United States

Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 760

You deserved it 2 490

By Anonymous - 03/06/2015 10:15 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 962

You deserved it 3 118

By aragmir - 18/12/2016 06:10 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station and figured I could sneak one out. It wound up being very loud, and I could hear the faint snickering of a patient in the next room. Every time he saw me for the rest of the day he would burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 697

You deserved it 2 869

Welshite 39

Saturday 19 April 2014 16:23

Silent, but deadly.

Thorvald22 17

Saturday 19 April 2014 16:22

Good god man what did you eat?

Comments

False_Stupidity 41

Sunday 20 April 2014 7:38

What was the cause is death? Arsephixiation?

FatherofTime87 18

Sunday 20 April 2014 8:48

Best ever.

thisguy22 33

Sunday 20 April 2014 13:12

Yes.

how_to_implode 17

Sunday 20 April 2014 20:05

I'm going to put my money on coincidence.

syed121417 22

Sunday 20 April 2014 22:56

And pretty sure there is no correlation

OzzyTheGiant 14

Monday 21 April 2014 3:47

hey man, stop eating taco bell! Now look what youve done! jk

copydude 7

Monday 21 April 2014 17:37

I am sooo sorry that this happened in the manner in which it did... BUT.... I can't help laughing my ass off right now!!

goodrich13 8

Wednesday 23 April 2014 8:44

That's pretty funny!

darkfireflame 15

Thursday 24 April 2014 20:10

No, I don't think your farts portend the deaths of the elderly. Kinda sucks though.

o_uhu_intrstng 4

Saturday 26 April 2014 8:27

is it bad this made me lmao?

Keywords

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Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

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Today, I tried to nicely talk to my daughter about her rapid weight gain. Having a family history of weight-related illness, I felt it was necessary. I offered to get thyroid tests, teach her to buy healthy food, and start routine exercise. She told everyone I called her a cow and had fat-shamed her. FML

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I agree, your life sucks 23 123

You deserved it 2 163

Today, my husband, who didn’t even cry when his father died, got angry and cried for an hour all because I put a 1 cm scratch on his classic car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 513

You deserved it 719

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 160

You deserved it 6 974

Today, I went to get my first acupuncture. The doctor was a cute Korean woman, so I tried to start a conversation. When she pricked me with a needle near the tailbone, I involuntarily let one loose and saw her gag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 134

You deserved it 2 004

Today, I was downtown with my boyfriend around Noon when we walked past a few guys who shouted out to me "You're the most beautiful girl we've seen all day". My boyfriend's response was "It's still early." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 155

You deserved it 4 450

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 141

You deserved it 6 661

Same thing different taste

Nightmare fuel

Death Rattle part 2: Electric Boogaloo

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