Work: Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching...

By Crap - 12/04/2016 16:48 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 832

You deserved it 2 961

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Same thing different taste

By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 862

You deserved it 11 396

By Anonymous - 08/09/2018 09:00 - United States - Buffalo

Today, while pooping at work, I was scrolling through social media. I dropped my phone in the toilet and the automatic flusher engaged, flushing my phone halfway into the pipes, which then flooded the toilet. I had to call maintenance and explain what happened to retrieve phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 792

You deserved it 2 198

By caught out - 26/04/2014 23:29 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 719

You deserved it 7 422

By B-ran - 05/01/2010 00:29 - France

Today, I was taking a dump at the Home Depot. After I was finished, I was bent over and pulling the toilet paper out of the holder. I pulled too hard, causing the dispenser lid to fling open and smack me on the back of the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 783

You deserved it 21 623

By Anonymous - 12/06/2015 02:12 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to use the bathroom really badly in a drug store. After I did a #2, just as I realized the handle on the toilet was broken, a knock came at the door. I tried fixing it for ten minutes, before slipping out the door, to come face to face with two employees coming to fix the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 876

You deserved it 2 784

By Crap - 30/07/2015 00:57 - United States - Seminole

Today, I had horrible diarrhea at work. When I felt the bubbling, I ran to the bathroom. An agonizing bowel movement later, I realized that there was no toilet paper in the stall. Just as I was about to ask a coworker who was in the bathroom for some, the fire alarm went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 178

You deserved it 1 710

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 18:18 - Netherlands - Den Dungen

Today, I fell asleep while taking a dump. At work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 983

You deserved it 4 835

We heard you

By PeePee - 03/07/2009 19:19 - United States

Today, at work I had to use the bathroom. I asked my boss to watch my register and quickly walked into the bathroom. I squatted down and peed. A minute later I heard someone ask over our walkie talkie system who was using the bathroom. I had been pressing the intercom button while I peed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 024

You deserved it 13 406

By random - 23/10/2013 22:41 - United States - Amarillo

Today, while working as a paramedic, we got called to an assisted living home. The medical emergency? The woman had a leak in her bathroom and wanted it fixed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 172

You deserved it 2 606

Gush gashed

By Anonymous - 29/06/2024 06:00 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 125

Ninjahiga 27

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:46

At least you know they have great service there

SixthSinEnvy 39

Wednesday 13 April 2016 4:07

Unless it's you're dealing with residents at risk for a heart attack or a stroke, meaning every single second counts...

Comments

Ninjahiga 27

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:46

At least you know they have great service there

False_Stupidity 41

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:50

Well, at least you know that that button works and that staff will respond fast...

krazy789 28

Wednesday 13 April 2016 4:51

your comment fail is funny because of your picture and name

TonierShadow 19

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:54

Mayday, mayday, brown hawk down.

SamSwebb 24

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:55

Don't worry they were probably relieved that they didn't have to assist you ... Or did they? Ha

CrassKal 27

Wednesday 13 April 2016 8:21

Coming from personal experience, if you aren't willing to help a sick person then you are in the wrong career.

jentrynicole 20

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:56

Once at work we heard a staff alert button going off so we ran into the room to see what was wrong. After about 6 of us ran in there, we saw no staff, and a man just muttered "I just wanted a cup of water." It happens. At least you know your coworkers will be ready to help you. :)

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:57

Shouldn't they knock first to make sure it's somebody with an emergency and not someone who accidentally pressed the button like you did? If there's no response to the knocking, then breaking in would be necessary.

SixthSinEnvy 39

Wednesday 13 April 2016 4:07

Unless it's you're dealing with residents at risk for a heart attack or a stroke, meaning every single second counts...

niallo 23

Wednesday 13 April 2016 8:50

I worked on a cardiac unit for many years, and actually had many patients code in the bathroom. If someone is coding, they usually don't pull the cord. The dead or dying don't usually have the time. The ones who do pull the cord are normally people who can't walk and need help back to bed. I always knock. I've never had someone pull the cord and code. And I worked on that unit for 13 years.

torrea 19

Wednesday 13 April 2016 21:33

I was thinking the same thing, but I only worked in a nursing home. So thanks for your comment. lol

Tripartita 44

Wednesday 13 April 2016 2:58

Sitcom rules dictate that you had to act impaired somehow for the rest of the day out of awkwardness. "Uh, did you need help, pal?" "Yes, my… arms don't work well because of… my age… or an injury I sustained… in a war I was in."