Today, I accidentally dropped my birth control pill on the floor and my dog ate it. The good news is, I startled her and she spit it right out. The bad news is, I still had to take it after it had been in my dog's mouth. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I accidentally dropped my birth control pill. My cat ate it before I could pick it up. FML
Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML
Today, my dog ate my little brother's medication. I spent all morning trying to make him throw it up, but it wasn't working so I took him to the animal hospital, which was in a different city. $150 in poison control and vet bills later, I found the pill we thought he ate stuck under his paw. FML
Today, my dog threw up on the tiled floor. I found out at 6 this morning in the dark when I slipped and fell in it. FML
Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML
Jagged Little Pill
Today, my daughter wanted to show me the tooth she had just lost. As I was in a rush to leave for work, I quickly picked up and swallowed my pill that was on the kitchen table. It was only until I looked back down at the table did I see not only my pill, but one extremely angry daughter glaring at me. FML
Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML
Today, I heard my dog chewing on something. I called her over, held out my hand, and told her to drop it. She dropped it into my hand, and I was proud of her. That was until I realized it was cat poop. FML
Today, I dropped my Xanax. It wasn't until after I washed it down with some water that I realized it was still on the floor and I had actually swallowed a pebble of cat litter. FML
Handful
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Top comments
yeti09 0
why???
acranine11 0
Better than getting pregnant
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (276)
freddykrueger56 2
Thats nasty
newlove_fml 0
I had to take birth control because of hormone imbalances that caused my body to malfunction. It's not just for pregnancy, like the above poster said. If she has hormone imbalances, condoms would not be very useful to her. And she could also be very poor, or just not know any better.
newlove_fml 0
I don't know where you're seeing these comments. As far as I can tell, no one here has called OP a **** or said she deserved it because she was having sex. I may be completely blind/stupid and didn't see them. Or did you infer that the other commentors got the impression that OP was a **** because they assumed OP was taking birth control to have sex and not get pregnant?
shinshoku13 19
Um no u didnt
mimerino 9
Did you know that dogs's mouths are cleaner than humans's?
hewro_failure 11
The good news is the dogs mouth is cleaner than a humans
capslockisgood 19
You only had one left?
Sir_Swaggington 6
Or you could've just not boned anyone that day.
wolfman2123 13
Did you at least rinse it off
wolfman2123 13
?
jazzmin1997 16
A dog's mouth is very clean, even cleaner than a human's mouth.