Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML
Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a make-out session in the backseat of his car, when we heard a voice coming from his pants. Who did he pocket dial? My house. At midnight, when I was supposed to be home. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, my boyfriend crashed his car while I was giving him road head. FML
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Top comments
oliver86 8
Guess you got pretty horny...
allmidnighteyes 11
Rebecca Black sends her sincerest apologies for having occupied the back seat at the time.
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Comments (140)
Aaaabeee 0
haha!
jess6blondie9 3
Then move to the backseat and you won't have that problem. (:
Not_Ever_Telling 3
Come on, now! Why the hell would you choose to **** in the driver's seat? Huh?
Bsane 0
agreed, who has sex on the drivers side, you move to the passage side, or the back, and if you wanna really get kinky you have the female bend over in the middle of both head rest, between the driver and passage side from the front of car, with her face facing the rear. Nice
Monii_Harlz 11
but worst of all.... in your mothers car? 0.o
vita987 0
they wanted to get caught there freaks, yumm
Laterial 3
This is why I'm so glad I drive a suburban with a foldable 3rd row seat and plenty of cargo space.
kevind_fml 0
sounds like your prepared! x)
132BlackRoses 0
I stopped feeling sympathetic towards you after I read "my boyfriend and i pulled over to have sex in his mother's car."
austinkiser 3
who knows maybe his mother had sex there too so hope everyone cleaned up haha
gOlfwAng_fml 0
I'm just going out on a limb here, your a blond aren't you?
oliver86 8
So you attempt to make a joke relating hair colour to intelligence and then spell blonde wrong. Nice one.
Imagirll 3
56- actually blonde can be spelled blond.
Freeze_fml 17
Blonde refers to females. Blond is a color.
hiyourcute 0
Both spellings are correct, depending on the context. The word is originally French, so it has two genders: blond if you are referring to a male, blonde if you are referring to a female. Blond is correct when referring directly to the color of the hair. "She has blond hair, so she is a blonde." Rant aside, the original commenter was wrong based on the context, but the word "blond" isn't technically a misspelling.
Getxscared 0
don't. toot your own horn
Keyman1212 14
It seems you've aroused the whole neighborhood, and not just each other.
heyyitslo 6
hahahaha nice one
Livinia 11
Now you know why everyone does it in the backseat :)
jcordero 0
hey what's up(:
krysxkatastrophe 14
1. You couldn't find someplace more private? 2. The backseat is bigger, you should have done it back there.