Love, Stalker and Scary: Creepy

Creepy

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 08:47 - Canada

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently duplicated my keys before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering, “He looks like Jesus.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 416

You deserved it 3 672

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/01/2014 21:24 - United States

Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 357

You deserved it 5 211

By Anonymous - 31/12/2015 18:15 - United States - Hyde Park

Today, I woke up to the sound of my psycho ex trying to break down my apartment door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 728

You deserved it 1 652

By drugged_on_arrival - 10/09/2009 10:55 - Virgin Islands British

Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight-now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 214

You deserved it 16 831

By Anonymous - 17/04/2012 20:53 - United States - International Falls

Today, I was sleeping in after working a graveyard shift. I awoke to my girlfriend sneaking her stuff out of the house. She planned on leaving her key on my pillow and taking off without any notice whatsoever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 372

You deserved it 2 040

By Big Baby - 28/01/2017 00:00

Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 440

You deserved it 805

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 649

You deserved it 4 567

By oh - 23/02/2016 02:41 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 552

You deserved it 2 096

Where am I?

By Anonymous - 13/10/2008 08:25

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but it wasn’t actually her. What happened last night? FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 992

You deserved it 108 901

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 034

You deserved it 3 378

By bTOhno - 13/08/2011 06:37 - United States

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 053

You deserved it 4 731

Rebecca1993 0

Sunday 20 December 2009 16:20

._. boy do you know how to pick them.

xCrackerx 3

Sunday 20 December 2009 16:48

She sounds like a keeper. Always by your side, just like a dog. That's loyalty.

Comments

eraepsekahs 0

Thursday 25 March 2010 18:54

thats creepy.

tplink 0

Sunday 9 May 2010 8:49

any one who reads this JUST LOST THE GAME!

crazy_lil_thing 0

Thursday 8 July 2010 6:27

Wtf? that's just weird.

mygiraffe 1

Sunday 11 July 2010 0:16

see this is why I have a bat behind my bed

smileygirl1234 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:24

I think this is probably fake...

ghozein 0

Wednesday 13 October 2010 6:54

comment moderated

ghozein 0

Wednesday 13 October 2010 6:54

comment moderated

chunkymunky666 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 1:40

my uncle looks like Jesus :D

doodlegirl90 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 4:42

Lol you should be in the hangover. I rofld

barbie333 0

Saturday 29 January 2011 4:41

sounds a little fake but I believe it(: some crazy ppl out there... favorite!

Keywords

Public freakouts Relatable Health Geek Music Scams Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Transportation Cops Bikes Kids Fight Family Mother in law AITA Miscellaneous Social Media Relationship advice Love Work Art Students Noise Sleep Animals Birds Mental health Medication

The Top

Today, I was crying after a bad day at work. As I walked down the street, a young boy in a minivan tried to get my attention. He kept saying, "Hi, hi, please wave!" in a sad voice. When I politely waved at him, I saw a group of kids in the van giggling hysterically and taking pictures of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 286

You deserved it 285

Today, I lost it on my co-workers about how hard I've been working, picking up everyone's slack with no appreciation, and it was clear that I needed to find a job that actually rewarded hard work. As I went to grab my jacket to leave, I saw a cake and gift card for a cruise on the table, from the staff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 136

You deserved it 72 916

The Top

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 977

You deserved it 52 439

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 384

You deserved it 13 697

Today, I learned that because I clean everything in my roommate's house and keep the lights low to save energy, and respect him and do things in the proper way I was raised, he and his friends and girlfriend think I’m weird and won’t speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 739

You deserved it 250

Today, I have to make a hard decision on whether I should move on and free my boyfriend from me and let him do his own thing while I do my own, or resolve our differences. Advice needed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 330

Today, I texted my girlfriend and told her I was mowing my lawn. She responded, "It's about time, it keeps getting caught in my teeth!" I was referring to the lawn outside of my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 269

You deserved it 54 402

Today I discovered the source of the foul smell in my garage. My freezer shit the bed with 50 pounds of meat in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 066

You deserved it 667

Creepy

Same thing different taste

Where am I?

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