Creepy

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 08:47 - Canada

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently duplicated my keys before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering, “He looks like Jesus.” FML
I agree, your life sucks 46 416
You deserved it 3 672
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

Rebecca1993 0

._. boy do you know how to pick them.

123 2
xCrackerx 3

She sounds like a keeper. Always by your side, just like a dog. That's loyalty.

70 1

Comments

wh4t3v3R 0

And new locks plus a Doberman, because restraining orders are only good when you're awake.

0 0
PinkDahlia 0

Dude, punch that stalker in the lip until it's so swolen she can't talk anymore.

0 2
Broly_fml 0

Gief, Me Want her :O Dude if I woke up with a Ex ontop of me That would be my dream as long as she wasnt bout to keeel meeh

0 0
guy_on_the_couch 0

FYL? That's funny as hell! I woulda done her after too.

0 1
wtfninja 0

Lmao, "He looks like Jesus"? That's great. xD

0 0
muffinsareyummy 1

and you're not taking that as a compliment because?...

0 0
JustApollo 0

You should've played along with it, been like "Yes, I do look like Jesus... Because I AM Jesus and you've been a very bad girl, (insert name here). I want you to leave now, don't make me angry or I may smite you. Go home and wait for the nice men in Blue Suits with shiny badges to take you to a better place." When she leaves which she would do because she is probably a schizophrenic I would call the police. :) But that's just me.

2 0
Ninjaface 0

You should have banged her... upside the head with the nearest heavy object.

0 1
emopunk666 0

kinda creepy but i would banged her then kicked her out again

0 1