Today, I spent my afternoon rummaging through old jeans and other pants, due to being broke and needing cash for ramen. FML
Infrastructure
Today, the city shut off our water, because they said we didn't pay the bill. Turns out, it was sitting on their desk the whole time. I guess sending someone out to turn off our water was easier than checking to see if we'd actually paid the bill. FML
Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML
ChristinePi tells us more.
ChristinePi 36
It was a nightmare to me because once you scratch a nonstick pan you're supposed to throw it away because underneath the coating there's a bunch of bad chemicals that increase your chances of getting cancer. I don't have the money to replace the pan and it wasn't cheap either. Dreams aren't logical, you cannot always control how you feel in them. I know it's silly but in the dream I was very upset about my pan and I woke up distraught. Hence why I consider it a nightmare. Funny enough, I actually did end up scratching one of my pots recently. I'm too poor to buy a new one so I am still using it. OTL
Today, I was helping out at my church. At lunchtime, a really cute guy my age walked over and told me I was pretty. I was flattered, until I turned around and saw his annoyed buddies handing him several dollar bills. FML
Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML
Today, I hit rock bottom; I watched one of those shitty infomercial channels, without even being forced into it at gunpoint. Even worse is that I practically creamed myself over a damn fruit juicer, all because it was 50% off and I could actually afford it. FML
Today, I donated to a charity website. My card was repeatedly refused by the website but when I went on my account, I was charged for each time I tried. I was scammed by a charity. FML
Today, I was at the reading of my grandma's will. Apparently I was removed from it some time ago, and the £2,500 I would have gotten went to my cheating bitch of an ex-fiancée. It seems my grandma adored her, and never forgave me for "driving her away" from the family. FML
Today, my life is so boring that I started looking through my can of coins and sorting them out by year. The oldest coin I have is from 1963. FML
Today, I celebrated my 22nd birthday. On my cake stood last year's "21" candle, to which had been added a single candle. Clearly, times are tough. FML
Today, I went to spend my last $50 on gas, since I get paid in 5 days. I paid for the gas and stepped into the restroom briefly. I came out, only to discover that the attendant had put the gas on the wrong pump, and someone had used it for themselves. My tank is empty. FML
ItsJustMe1616 tells us more.
This situation got a lot more difficult before it got better. For starters, in hindsight I know I should've started pumping my gas first before going to the bathroom but I've done this plenty of times before and never had this problem (and I really had to go lol). As a side note, I live in Colorado and I have never seen a full service gas station anywhere in my state. And for the couple people calling me stupid about my "lack of a budget", I bought my dad a nice Father's Day gift and so after paying all my bills I was left with basically nothing. The attendant refused to admit that he had put it on the wrong pump so I called the company (Shell for those wondering) and they had the store GM come out to avoid getting the police involved. It took him an hour to show up and the attendant was being an ass the whole time. Cameras showed the GM that the attendant made the mistake (even though he was still trying to deny it). Finally after about 2 hours the GM filled my tank up and gave me a gas card for the 50 as an apology. And he ended up firing the attendant for his lack of professionalism. Sorry for the long reply everyone but thanks for the good wishes and taking the time to share your input! Definitely going to pump my gas first next time.
Golden
Today, I found out that the guy who asked me out only did so because he thought I "looked rich." He broke everything off once he found out I live in a one-bedroom apartment and drive a 14-year old Volvo. FML
Today, I got a very serious case of the shits while in the middle of trying to close a sale, and had to run to the bathroom. My coworker picked up the sale, stealing all the commission in the process. FML
shudson186 tells us more.
shudson186 17
OP here, this is very embarrassing. This client was actually a very good friend of mine and I told her I would be back in a few moments. She understood completely I just informed her to place it at the cash. My coworker however did come along to ring her through placing the items under her name in the system. Which made me lose out on a $500 dollar sale. So far management has done nothing, but I think she does feel bad because she knew she was in the wrong. My mistake though for eating a big unhealthy breakfast that did not agree with my bowels. For future I take this into consideration.
Cough up
Today, I finally finished a drawing that someone had asked and said they would pay me for. I worked on it for multiple hours and was very proud of it. When it came to discussing payment, I asked what his best offer was. A pack of cigarettes. FML
The cheek!
Today, my daughter used her spare key to get into my house while I was at work, then took and pawned off all of my jewelry. She only confessed when I confronted her with video camera footage. Her defense was that I told her I'd leave her everything in my will. Honey, I'm not dead yet. FML
Today, my landlord's control issue got out of control when I got a call telling me I have "too much stuff" and have to move out of the apartment. I sold all my furniture when I moved in and all I currently own is a scratch post, a chair and a pair of curtains. FML
Today, I received a $20 gift card to Tim Horton's as a prize, and decided to use it. At the register, I was told that I'd essentially won an empty gift card. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my friend, where my credit card got denied in front of everyone. The staff teased me and made me sit in the restaurant while my friend begged for money outside. FML
Today, a lady handed me a $10 tip on a $45 bill. I was happy with it, since it was more than 20%, until she came back in and said, "I'm sorry I gave you the wrong amount." I handed it back to her and then she gave me a dollar. FML
Busker parkour
Today, I came across a street musician. He looked extremely well-fed already, but his music was pretty good, so I gave him some spare change. As soon as I turned away, he started screaming at me for being "cheap", and chased me half a block before running out of breath. FML
Today, after ten years, our sewing machine broke. My mom tried to return it back to the store she bought it from. FML
Today, I sat and watched the CEO of DreamWorks on TV misuse words such as "quantum". He's filthy rich, whereas I'm a savagely underpaid gardener. FML
PoeticPathetic tells us more.
I'm the OP Where I live a lot of my peers went to uni and ended up with jobs that pay even less than mine. Tradies get the big dollars in my state
Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML
Today, I brought home my 3D glasses after a movie. I had a laugh about it until I realized that I put my $100 sunglasses in the recycle box outside of the theatre instead. FML
Today, I graduated from Basic Training. I was really looking forward to seeing my family after being away for almost three months. They decided not to come to graduation because they didn't want to spend the money to travel here. They live 30 minutes away. FML
eBay fail
Today, I discovered that the laser disc player I used to have was not in fact a laser disc player but a Pioneer Laseractive. Broken ones sell on eBay for $200 and working ones sell for around $1000. I sold a working one for less than $100-worth of credit at a second-hand store. FML
Today, four days after making a $100 bet with my balding, pedo-stache wearing dad over who could get a girlfriend first, he came home and introduced me to his new girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to a restaurant so I could apply for a job, and we decided to eat there. After we finished, I went to start the car. When we got home, I asked him how much the bill came to. Apparently he didn't pay. I had already given them my completed application. FML
Today, a woman attempted to pickpocket me while trying to educate me about God. FML
v1k1rox tells us more.
v1k1rox 12
This is the second time someone tried to rob me well living in NYC you know things like that happen. I didn't notice until after she pushed me that something was fishy. She tried to go into my bag first then into my pocket when she discovered there was nothing in my bag. She failed, I wish she didn't run away so I can get her arrested.
Quite the catch
Today, I was shopping for dresses when my fiancé turned into what I can only call a groomzilla. He told me and my maid of honor that we need to lose weight because he's not "paying all this money for a pair of fatties to not look good." FML