Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me, thinking it would be the nice thing to do I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow. FML

#828379
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17847) - you deserved it (60004)

On 04/06/2009 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met an old friend, with whom I have a complicated history and we hooked up. He came before we even started. In his sleep, he pushed me out of the bed. When I woke up, he had peed himself in his sleep. Glad I let that ship sail. FML

#17959088
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17848) - you deserved it (21708)

On 10/11/2011 at 10:51am - intimacy - by CC (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML

#492
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17832) - you deserved it (6777)

On 12/11/2008 at 5:40am - misc - by Pfff - Sent from mobile version

Today, I tested a new drug designed to fight headaches. It had quite an effect on me, more specifically side effects: nausea, dizzyness and diarrhea. FML

#579
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17833) - you deserved it (4250)

On 12/23/2008 at 3:57am - health - by blabla - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to sit here for 8 hours copying and pasting thousands of product codes on a frigging spreadsheet. My job title is not data entry, I'm a graphic designer. FML

#1791
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17830) - you deserved it (2275)

On 01/19/2009 at 8:23pm - work - by Lincoln - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized the only reason my phone ever rings is because someone needs help with their computer. FML

#19672620
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17826) - you deserved it (1939)

On 05/24/2012 at 12:41pm - misc - by that guy - United States

Today, I was woken up by my roommates cat meowing so loudly at her door, wanting in. Suddenly it stopped. I was just falling back into sleep when I rolled over and the cat was right there beside my head. Meowing. FML

#3778
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17822) - you deserved it (2485)

On 01/30/2009 at 1:18pm - animals - by Noname - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I queued up for few hours in torrential rain to see the Harry Potter premiere. After just four hours sleep and waking at 3am, I fell asleep during film and missed the whole thing. FML

#3549389
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17822) - you deserved it (57719)

On 07/07/2009 at 7:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I got marinara sauce on my new white shirt. I went in my desk for my Tide-To-Go pen and started using it on the spot. Turns out orange highlighters look a lot like Tide-To-Go pens when you don't look closely enough. FML

#3249982
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17820) - you deserved it (47119)

On 06/26/2009 at 6:03pm - misc - by Saucy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

#966838
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17818) - you deserved it (86052)

On 04/14/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by seussical65 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I missed my bus. But it didn't miss me. I've been in the hospital for 8 hours with a broken leg. FML

#21413750
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17818) - you deserved it (1238)

On 05/21/2015 at 9:55pm - money - by FrickingBusDrivers (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML

#8622338
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17812) - you deserved it (5258)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:57pm - work - by Herman - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out the hard way that it is possible to sunburn the soles of your feet. FML

#19628540
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17807) - you deserved it (4513)

On 05/15/2012 at 6:39pm - health - by Leadamp (man) -



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: