Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, it was the elections for Student Council President. I decided to be nice and vote for the only other competitor because it was her birthday. I lost by one vote. FML

#5876259
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16690) - you deserved it (45938)

On 10/18/2009 at 8:25am - misc - by presidont (woman) - Switzerland

Today, my boyfriend proposed. Two hours later I get a text from my ex announcing he has just been diagnosed with chlamydia. I now have to explain this to my fiancé. FML

#19890281
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16678) - you deserved it (30569)

On 07/04/2012 at 10:45am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, we went out to dinner to a family restaurant, and I was wearing a skirt since it's so warm out. My 4 year old scooted under the table to sit next to his brother. When he popped up on the other side, he exclaimed, "Mommy! You forgot to put on your underwears!" People were staring. FML

#2140359
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16677) - you deserved it (58743)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:45am - kids - by whoopsiedoodle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, for once, I managed to get my boyfriend's mind off the hockey game. I muted the TV and cuddled up to him. Only thirty seconds into snuggling, he shoved me onto the floor and screamed, "GOAL!" FML

#13626232
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16674) - you deserved it (27855)

On 10/28/2010 at 12:29pm - love - by Fatality (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought I saw a woodchuck far out in my yard. I wanted to take a cool picture of it so I slowly crept closer and closer to it. I spent half an hour sneaking up on a log. FML

#2900113
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16667) - you deserved it (48988)

On 06/14/2009 at 11:37pm - misc - by thelarkscaw (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boss' incompetent, lazy son got another raise. He only started working here five months ago. Since then he's been promoted twice and given a Bentley as a company car. All this while company profits are in the shitter and the rest of us are facing a wave of layoffs. FML

#21399022
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16674) - you deserved it (999)

On 04/24/2015 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I blurted out something like "humdidumdum erm lalala" in public, attracting mystified stares. The thing is, I do this every time I remember something embarrassing I've said or done in the past, in an attempt to erase it out of my consciousness. So it happens a lot. FML

#19499543
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16662) - you deserved it (9144)

On 04/20/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by Ashamed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I work for a boss who does everything he can to singlehandedly ruin our company and drive us into the ground. I just got an e-mail from him saying I need to be a more positive and energetic role-model for our team. Pot… meet Kettle. FML

#2158
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16659) - you deserved it (2082)

On 01/22/2009 at 7:45am - work - by DarkPain - United States (California)

Today, I realized the extent of my crush on one of my employees. I found myself cropping our picture out of the staff photo to see what we would look like as a couple. FML

#3787096
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16659) - you deserved it (38391)

On 07/15/2009 at 10:08pm - work - by beingthebossisoverrated (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

#615927
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16657) - you deserved it (71685)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I noticed that whenever someone belches, I immediately think of my boyfriend. FML

#19636097
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16656) - you deserved it (3216)

On 05/17/2012 at 8:00am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16657) - you deserved it (31548)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

#2350763
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16653) - you deserved it (68586)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2 : School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: