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Today, my secret crush, who sits next to me in Bio, asked if he could borrow my notes. I agreed. It was only after he drove away, with my notebook, that I realized that in the back of my notes, I had written his name 100 times, surrounded by little hearts. FML

#5869946
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15235) - you deserved it (38683)

On 10/17/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by Lovenotes (woman) - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I reached climax. While I was screaming, my 4 year old son comes in with his water gun because he thought I was in trouble. FML

#14860597
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15235) - you deserved it (53490)

On 02/06/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I remember that I changed my phone lock password when I was still half asleep this morning, but I don't remember what I changed it to. FML

#19796326
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15229) - you deserved it (21620)

On 06/16/2012 at 9:44am - misc - by sadphonegirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML

#1690267
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15226) - you deserved it (78757)

On 05/06/2009 at 1:04pm - misc - by ElamentalAngel - United Kingdom

Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML

#12023647
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15218) - you deserved it (27903)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Syrinth (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to lay out and tan. I fell asleep and got sun burned and bitten numerous times by mosquitoes. If I scratch my itch, the burn hurts terribly. If I don't scratch it, it itches terribly. FML

#10772340
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15217) - you deserved it (32458)

On 05/26/2010 at 4:17am - health - by kaylajere - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15216) - you deserved it (25555)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was finally going to Best Buy to get The Sims 3. I was so excited to get it that I ran to the back of the store to get it, and tripped over a little boy in the process, which made me stumble into a CD rack and knock it over. Which made the rest of the CD racks fall over like dominoes. FML

#2759845
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15209) - you deserved it (53367)

On 06/09/2009 at 10:37pm - misc - by Sims3luver (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15207) - you deserved it (49553)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, at lunch, I told a bunch of people how I had been in love with this guy since freshman year. I made a bunch of jokes about how I was going to marry him and our kids would be so attractive. He was at the table next to mine and looked back at me as soon as I finished. FML

#2341
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15202) - you deserved it (14484)

On 01/23/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML

#1415940
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15200) - you deserved it (82297)

On 04/28/2009 at 4:53am - love - by H-B (man) - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kids were thirsty, so I poured them both a cup of the green juice I'd found in a jug in their fridge. They downed it in a flash. It wasn't until later on after I'd poured myself a cup and taken a sip, I realized I had given them margarita mix. The kids are 4 and 2. FML

#3515386
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15200) - you deserved it (53670)

On 07/05/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by smth (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I went jogging with my girlfriend. I'm pretty sure my moobs bounced more than her breasts. FML

#18697207
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15200) - you deserved it (26416)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by max (man) - United States (California)



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