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Today, I got marinara sauce on my new white shirt. I went in my desk for my Tide-To-Go pen and started using it on the spot. Turns out orange highlighters look a lot like Tide-To-Go pens when you don't look closely enough. FML

#3249982
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17821) - you deserved it (47119)

On 06/26/2009 at 6:03pm - misc - by Saucy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

#966838
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17818) - you deserved it (86061)

On 04/14/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by seussical65 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML

#8622338
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17813) - you deserved it (5258)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:57pm - work - by Herman - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out the hard way that it is possible to sunburn the soles of your feet. FML

#19628540
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17809) - you deserved it (4513)

On 05/15/2012 at 6:39pm - health - by Leadamp (man) -

Today, my cat has decided she can't eat unless I'm right there with her, so when she gets hungry she finds me and howls until I follow her to her food dish. She likes to eat pretty frequently, and I'm already getting a headache. FML

Today, I tagged along with some friends to a party in the woods. Halfway into the night, a party-goer's boyfriend got extremely drunk and violent, causing the others to panic and drive away in the two cars we pooled in. My best friend and I had to run all the way back home on foot. FML

#20134435
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17803) - you deserved it (3637)

On 10/26/2012 at 4:49pm - misc - by Miss Spasticator (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML

#18605439
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17802) - you deserved it (51630)

On 12/25/2011 at 6:39am - animals - by Anonymoose (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I lied to a group of 8 year olds about having a boyfriend. FML

#12049549
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17800) - you deserved it (27685)

On 07/22/2010 at 7:08pm - love - by jennavankirk - United States

Today, I had to lie to my therapist about my sex life to make me feel better. FML

#7696686
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17793) - you deserved it (5642)

On 01/30/2010 at 1:50am - intimacy - by virgo - Sent from mobile version

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

#19588733
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17785) - you deserved it (3839)

On 05/07/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was surfing and trying to impress some girls on the beach. While I was out in the water, a jellyfish wrapped itself around my torso. I started to yell and freak out, making a huge scene. I grabbed it off of me, only to realize that I was freaking out over a plastic grocery bag. FML

#915602
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17784) - you deserved it (53146)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by effingawwesome (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I said thanks to a man who got up for me in the bus. He angrily said "no, not you!". The old lady who sat down is now staring at me. FML

#439
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17782) - you deserved it (6597)

On 12/03/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by pam - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had a playing test in orchestra, which I've pracriced over 30 hours for. After I played my part, which I thought I did very well, my teacher asked how much I had practice. Trying to show off, I said "Oh, just 30 minutes." My teacher said "It shows, that was terrible." She was serious. FML

#982369
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17780) - you deserved it (54362)

On 04/15/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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