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Today, I found out that the little arrow next to my gas gauge actually points to the side of the car where the tank is. For the past year-and-a-half I've been sticking my head out the window and even calling my parents to ask which side it was on, because I can never remember. FML

#21071932
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16479) - you deserved it (46150)

On 02/26/2014 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, our boss asked us out to lunch and told us to choose wherever we wanted to eat. Thinking that she’d be paying for it, we chose a pricey seafood restaurant. When we'd eaten, she told us that we could pay her back later. FML

#15111306
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16476) - you deserved it (29127)

On 02/25/2011 at 3:27am - money - by naughtytwinsisters (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I was working and some woman wanted to pay with a credit card. It already had a picture on the card so you don't have to ask for i.d., and just glancing at it I asked, "Oh, is this your husband's card?" She then replied, "No, that's just me with glasses and short hair." FML

#2558770
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16472) - you deserved it (42570)

On 06/03/2009 at 2:50am - work - by em (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

#20497647
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16468) - you deserved it (25954)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:58pm - animals - by fish killer - Canada

Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML

#12612052
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16467) - you deserved it (27887)

On 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by roflcopter (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML

#20017935
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16466) - you deserved it (15415)

On 08/13/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by brooke - United States

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, it was my two-and-a-half year anniversary with my girlfriend, a small but noble occasion. She surprised me with an invention of hers, a plate of triple-chocolate double-mint cookies topped with Andes mints. I surprised her by crashing her new Mustang into a cement divider. FML

#2724554
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16449) - you deserved it (45880)

On 06/08/2009 at 5:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML

#15713068
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16445) - you deserved it (23997)

On 04/09/2011 at 7:00pm - animals - by Danielle - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML

#17188633
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16445) - you deserved it (43680)

On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)

Today, I spent an hour writing 80 thank you cards to everyone who attended my graduationg party. After carefully personalizing each one and sealing them shut, I realized I did not mark the envelopes with names. FML

#3107410
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16444) - you deserved it (43629)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML

#4923649
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16443) - you deserved it (57401)

On 08/30/2009 at 3:12am - health - by tomchuq (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I shaved half my eyebrow off trying to shave my uni-brow. FML

#18355886
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16439) - you deserved it (28744)

On 11/26/2011 at 11:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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