“I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.”

How does washing cat piss off of 18 pairs of shoes stack up?

You wash 18 pairs of shoes covered in cat piss, I'm sure you'll be delighted to do it.

I don’t have 18 pairs of shoes, Ivanka!

Just because someone is worse off, doesn't invalidate another's problems. By your standards I should never fucking complain about anything because I wasn't tortured or killed in the holocaust, right?

"Today, I worked hard fortifying the premises against predators only to find out that my human's cousin undid 36 bunkers worth of work. FML"

I just can't bring myself to say "your life sucks" to someone who has 18 pairs of shoes "including some expensive heels".

I can get the 18 pairs of shoes, cuz lots of people have that many. What gets me is why OP was keeping them under their desk instead of in a closet, especially with kittens in the house.

Why do you even have so many shoes? Isn't one set of foot armour enough?

Same argument could be said about shirts. Why so many different kinds? I mean, one shirt does it, just wash and reuse, or buy all the same basic, $3 shirt! People like different things, people like variety. Shoes, Clothes, Hats, decor, games, etc..

What a bummer. Now you have an excuse to buy more shoes!

That's 36 shoes, no one needs that many shoes. And how did they all fit under your desk?

I hate to tell you this, OP, but those aren't your shoes anymore. They belong to the kittens now. Better luck next time.