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Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

#20201125
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21465) - you deserved it (1828)

On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my landlord sent tree cutters to take down a tree in our front yard. I didn't realize their job included walking around the house and gratuitously staring at me through the window as I dressed. My boyfriend won't complain because he's afraid our rent will go up in retaliation. FML

#14554836
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21466) - you deserved it (7166)

On 01/12/2011 at 2:42pm - misc - by iheartnjdevils - United States (Texas)

Today, I let a friend borrow a power saw. When I found it on my porch later, the blade was missing and the cord was cut. Looking closer, I realized it was his saw. He kept my new one. He totally denies that he switched them and now won't answer his door. FML

#20128630
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21464) - you deserved it (1892)

On 10/22/2012 at 6:34pm - misc - by petra84 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my sister-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer. My mother then confided in me that she suspected it was a prank to get more money from our family. FML

#20125135
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21460) - you deserved it (1415)

On 10/20/2012 at 11:10am - misc - by iamsolid - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to make me dinner surrounded by a candlelight setting. By the time I got home, we had 7 firefighters surrounding our house. Turns out one of the candles fell on the carpet and lit up the curtain as well. FML

#19906711
115 comments

Today, I got a brand new couch. My husband told me to keep our puppy off of it so we could keep it nice. She jumped on it, and as I picked her up to put her back on the floor, her claws dragged across it and ripped 2 of the cushions. FML

#13050784
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21458) - you deserved it (8672)

On 09/14/2010 at 5:46pm - misc - by miss Suzanne - United States (New York)

Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML

#20066447
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21455) - you deserved it (7389)

On 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm - work - by kevcng (man) - United States

Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML

#19362794
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21453) - you deserved it (2359)

On 03/28/2012 at 9:52am - misc - by andromeda80 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received the "employee of the month" title from the job I was fired from last week. FML

#20059608
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21453) - you deserved it (1478)

On 09/05/2012 at 10:02pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it was nice out, so I drove with my car windows down. I was stopped trying to turn onto a busy highway, when a car turned off the highway right next to me, hit a pothole, and splashed dirty water into my window and into my open mouth. FML

#8800523
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21451) - you deserved it (3757)

On 03/03/2010 at 3:16pm - misc - by pothole - United States (Maryland)

Today, I let my imbecile of a brother borrow my car. The keys to his car are now jammed into the ignition of mine. FML

#19821564
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21451) - you deserved it (4289)

On 06/20/2012 at 11:44pm - misc - by thesmartone - United States

Today, I moved into my aunt's house. She had a little too much fun in the sixties and now tells everyone about her many imagined conquests, including her church minister and several has-been celebrities. As a plus, I discovered she has a habit of wandering around the house in the nude. FML

#8920023
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21449) - you deserved it (3230)

On 03/08/2010 at 2:31pm - misc - by Kristopher (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that just because I got my braces removed does not mean my painful mouth ulcers will stop. I now have them under my tongue. I can't even lick my lips. FML

#14541152
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21448) - you deserved it (2317)

On 01/11/2011 at 1:38am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)



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