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Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML

#19585555
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20861) - you deserved it (2676)

On 05/07/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was getting changed in front of my room mate of two years. Feeling comfortable, I took off all my clothes and started putting new clothes on. I asked why she wasn't taking her eyes off my naked body. She said "I'm loving the view. Didn't you know I'm a lesbian?" FML

#5094881
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20859) - you deserved it (54149)

On 09/07/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by EyesOffMe (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was leaving the car wash when I saw my friend walking on the sidewalk. I pulled over next to her and asked if she wanted a ride. Only after getting a face full of the soda she was drinking did I realize I was talking to a complete stranger. FML

#13818357
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20861) - you deserved it (6685)

On 11/12/2010 at 7:24pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some of my friends when I fell asleep. When I woke up, I found that they had shaved the F word into my arm. I don't know what is more disturbing: the fact that this is what my friends do for fun, or that I have enough arm hair to have four letters shaved into it. FML

#19532931
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20859) - you deserved it (4030)

On 04/26/2012 at 4:23pm - misc - by HAIRY (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I saw a very attractive young woman struggling with some boxes. The seduction attempt resulted in me carrying 60lbs of items for 30mins. When we got to her apartment, she thanked me and introduced me to her boyfriend. FML

#20579784
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20861) - you deserved it (38839)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by JacktheRussian (man) - United States

Today, I took my two kids to a Christmas festival with a train theme. I spent $24 on conductor hats for them. When I gave them the hats, they threw them on the ground and put the red paper bags they came in on their heads. FML

#14289494
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20858) - you deserved it (6414)

On 12/21/2010 at 8:15pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband has been painting our house all weekend and plans to finish the job after work today. I decided to surprise him by completing the job myself. Painting the last window frame, I dropped the open tin of white paint, right onto our car roof. FML

#14696653
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20855) - you deserved it (9503)

On 01/24/2011 at 9:43am - misc - by Llaurin (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I tried to get over my childhood phobia of syringes by donating blood. The phlebotomist hadn't even touched the needle before I started sobbing hysterically. They made me leave. FML

#13219092
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20852) - you deserved it (12588)

On 09/27/2010 at 3:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I couldn’t have a conversation with my fiancé unless it was about Dragon Ball Z. FML

#19122021
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20853) - you deserved it (6754)

On 02/20/2012 at 10:53am - love - by DBZ (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, we had our annual office Christmas party. The theme of the party was "Ugliest Sweater". The winner was a sweater that I have an exact replica of in my closet. It's my favorite 'special occasion', 'family portrait' and 'holiday' sweater. FML

#6695498
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20853) - you deserved it (11723)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:52pm - misc - by NotHauteCouture (woman) - United States

Today, I told my 10 year old brother I was turning 23. He said, "You need to get a boyfriend." FML

#1565
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20852) - you deserved it (3136)

On 01/18/2009 at 9:30am - kids - by NVP - United States (Ohio)

Today, after leaving work at 10 pm, I took a shortcut to the highway. After getting lost, my GPS informed me that the service was unavailable and I should try back in an hour. This occurred moments before I ran out of gas. FML

#8861127
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20845) - you deserved it (7554)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by Lost... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML

#19806951
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20839) - you deserved it (2939)

On 06/18/2012 at 12:05pm - misc - by Myriam (woman) - Maldives (Maale)



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