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Today, it's my birthday. My dad came to pick me up, but after I had put my backpack in the back seat and closed the car door, he drove off without me. It started to rain, and I was without my phone or wallet. FML

#17682370
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23834) - you deserved it (2005)

On 09/06/2011 at 6:53pm - misc - by poisongrl (woman) - Macedonia (Karpos)

Today, I went to see my orthodontist. He informed me that I have an underbite and I will probably need braces again. I just had them taken off last year, after five and a half years of oral hell. FML

#20044922
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (1873)

On 08/27/2012 at 6:16pm - health - by Albert (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML

#3602440
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (55845)

On 07/09/2009 at 2:21am - health - by Fattypatty (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a customer told me how unprofessional my piercing made me look, and insisted that someone else wait on his table. It's not a piercing, it's a mole. FML

#21451761
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23829) - you deserved it (1549)

On 08/04/2015 at 1:02pm - work - by Mmorgan771 - United States (Florida)

Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the "Like" button on everyone's status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples' nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said "I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP". I liked that her grandmother died. FML

#316205
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23828) - you deserved it (193683)

On 03/14/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by like - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my daughter has a hit list. There are over thirty names on there. My name is on it as well. FML

#20135128
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23827) - you deserved it (3588)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23827) - you deserved it (78845)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I was waiting in line for what seemed like forever at the only open lane at the grocery store. The guy in front of me took his sweet time and had multiple cards rejected, before finally pulling out a $100 bill and demanding exact change. He was buying a carton of milk. FML

#19467160
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23825) - you deserved it (2037)

On 04/14/2012 at 3:27pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I like, who also happens to be my coworker. She told my boss, and they're laughing about it as I type this. FML

#21436632
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23825) - you deserved it (2837)

On 07/05/2015 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML

#19949441
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23825) - you deserved it (5329)

On 07/17/2012 at 9:54am - health - by Anonymous - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I was doing my grocery shopping, absent-mindedly wondering if my new diet was working. I got my answer when my panties fell down around my ankles. FML

#14719837
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23823) - you deserved it (7290)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:44pm - misc - by knickersdontfit (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML

#19896420
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23822) - you deserved it (2309)

On 07/05/2012 at 6:15pm - misc - by Oh dear (woman) - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines (Saint George)

Today, I found out that my husband and my cat have something in common; they both like to lick themselves. FML

#19812201
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23823) - you deserved it (2541)

On 06/19/2012 at 6:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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