maruskasommers
Czech Republic
Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
imblue42
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
United States
Content warning
Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML
not as scarred as he should be
Cambridge, Canada
Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML
Sonofa
Cold Lake, Canada
Not now, guys
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML
smf_ds
Rebordosa, Portugal
Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my mom the rashes his hemorrhoids are giving him. FML
nomorecleaning
Augusta, United States
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
ouharguohargssdf
Fort Wayne, United States
Today, my wife made me go with her to dinner with her parents, despite their long-standing hatred of me. Later on, my mother-in-law muttered to me, "I made yours special for ya", smirked, then made a show of scratching at her butt-crack. FML
Anonymous
Love is love
Today, I found out my dad is dating my dead mom's best friend. FML
Username
Life is a roller coaster
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
maddie
United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were at dinner with his parents when he discreetly slid his hand up my skirt and tickled me. This caused me to kick his dad's recently broken leg. FML
Top comments
Mole116 4
LOL WTF. That's... creepy... O_o
GoW_Chick 15
It's all about teamwork in a healthy marriage, I bet they're a really happy couple.
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Comments (209)
Mole116 4
LOL WTF. That's... creepy... O_o
ColdplaySucks 18
And to think they eat off the same utensils...
J3R3MYY 14
I didnt want to think about that. Im glad my parents are diverced.
kyarush 10
And you'll think of that every time you grab a fork.... Yummy
D37H100 5
Who knows what else they've done. No utensil is safe..
Badjuju7711 0
Now that's true love :D
NomNomMuffin 5
I bet you that friend asked A LOT of questions.....
spencerstoaker 7
Well, I'd rather scratch it with a fork than with my bare hand... Though the best would be to not do it at all!
doctorwhogirl 0
and then she gave you that fork to eat your lunch with!
shift_love 13
Your mom was forking your dad in the ass.
amypatel21 2
Ewwww that's gross!! I hope u don't accidentally use that fork to eat...
You_Need_Soap 6
That's forked up!
Country29 16
I think its safe to say u are scarred for life!
thatshot808 6
mmm buttscratcha!!
broski4life 0
I was eating spagetti while I read this :( yuck
ZombieLoveA 0
Omg! I'm eating spaghetti too.
glenzhao2 16
Oh come on, someday you'll learn to appreciate a good butt forking too.
periwinkle95 10
Delicious.
freakinglaugher 10
These crazy kids, and their forking. I remember the fml days of good old armpit sex.
Just_A_Panda 9
#71 Lmao you made my day.
theaws0m3guy 4
Buttscratcher? Buttscratcher? Buttscratcher!
linkinpark98 24
I see...
armandoX113 0
thats cute ;)
BeefyQueef 5
*That's
J3R3MYY 14
Cute?!?!?! I dont want to know what your definition of beautiful is..
melbournearsenal 18
What's wrong with you?
Monii_Harlz 11
Kinky ;D
eatsleepjb 8
...........
kjcookie10 9
Make sure you don't grab that fork when you eat!!!
22jrdn55 15
SARCASM PEOPLE!
MuziKMajoR 5
That's sexy?????? Ewww
aydriii 0
Ha.
bobbycorwen 5
Where are the sarcasm people?! I felt like it was a warning.
armandoX113 0
it was a joke dumbshits
cheerbabe3254 4
Um armandoX113 they r not dumbshits and u cannot say stuff THT nasty is cute
Atheros69 6
Should have stop, and slowly walk away.
ThaBeasty01 5
at least they werent having sex
SmittyJA24 26
It's still a bad visual. Very bad. I'd be poking my eyes out.
AlaskanEskimo34 0
120-not with that fork you won't.
LSUFAN98 0
U already said that dipshit
GoW_Chick 15
It's all about teamwork in a healthy marriage, I bet they're a really happy couple.
JacobWithaY 5
"Oh honey!! Mmm get the spoon! After that it's your turn!"
AlaskanEskimo34 0
It's better than seeing them having....actually no, nevermind sex is natural, scratching someone's ass with a fork is not.
Pelreskovich 11
She was hungry..? In all seriousness though, I hope you made sure that fork stayed out of the silverware drawer.
SkoomaKi 28
Hungry for what?! Butt skin flakes? *shudders*
Pelreskovich 11
Your reply reminded me of that segment from Austin Powers Goldmember where what's his name eats his dried skin flakes.. *shivers* :D
deviable 9
Hungry for some hot ass.
SaMmIMonster96 6
Ewwww.... Haha but very funny :)
seriouslythat 6
67 he also had them pee on the skin flakes >.
zombicidal 11
at least she want stabbing him like Lui Ann's mom enjoy your parents happy marriage
ZDK5498 6
hopefully she did not set the table with that fork included..,
nabila21 0
I saw that episode of King Of The Hill. ;)
Blueglasscup 18
And he never came back...
non_finisher 9
Hahaha..thats rude :|
periwinkle95 10
92- why'd you laugh then?
loserman67 36
So are you politely and gently trying to tell everyone here that your dad lets your mom fork him in the ass? See what I did there?
Pelreskovich 11
Clever.. Lol. :D
thaskipsta 1
Clever, I like it!
AlaskanEskimo34 0
Spooning leads to forking, and if you catch them forking, you could cut the tension with a knife.
kristena103 14
????nice one brah
Amrel 10
If he lets her fork him, i hope she lets him pork her
bobbycorwen 5
Then they spoon together.
bobbycorwen 5
After they chicken to the motel.
OnlyOnFML 0
Imagine all the food eaten with those forks...