Today, I was chatting to a friend on Facebook about girls, and why we're single. We somehow ended up admitting to one another that we'd never get girlfriends, finding out that we both like hentai porn, and trading info on Japanese sex toys. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I made a friend on an online chat. We got along fairly well and even traded Facebook accounts. I found out that the two of us had a lot of very surprising things in common. We were the same age, we were from the same school, and we even had the same boyfriend. FML
Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments, and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML
Today, I was half paying attention to a text message conversation with someone about how addicted we both were to social media. It's wasn't until deep into the conversation that I realized we were actually talking about porn. FML
Today, my friends and I were acting out porn scenes without sex. Then, I realized that we all watch too much porn, and we are still all virgins. FML
Today, I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites. Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked pictures of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls. His excuse? "I have friends on there." FML
Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML
Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML
Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML
Today, I had lunch with an old friend I've had a crush on for years. We're both single, so I figured it to be kind of like a date. Until he started talking about how he told his brother last night that we would never be a thing. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML
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Top comments
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
And that's why...
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
What. The. ****?
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Comments (235)
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
And that's why...
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
I meant like instead of talking to a girl or goin out he was having a pity party with his friend. I find it weird but everybody has their thing if that what he's into that fine but he is deeming himself incapable to get a girl rather than trying , It came off wrong but you get the gist
ICastillo 25
#23 How would you get a conversation like that even started? OP: "Hey I like watching anime girls getting raped by tentacle monsters what about you?.... Oh yeah and I'm also interested In Japenese sex Toys... Just throwing that out there."
Ameel_fml 19
"Not necessarily. I've met plenty of girls into that sort of thing. The reason is probably more in their lack of confidence than their strange interests." To be fair, it would probably put off the majority of girls. When someone says they like Japanese ****/hentai, there's a certain...uh...stereotype that comes with that.
happle 21
Well, it's not something you bring up when you first meet someone...
greatdanen 6
52 I beg to differ. I know a Guy who's into that and still gets lots of ass... ok it's me
ICastillo 25
Oh man you're cool bro. ^^
happle 21
67 Somehow I don't believe you. If you really "got a lot of ass," I don't think you'd feel the need to say it.
gc327072 31
67- coolest story I've heard all day.
X_Codes 11
@52 - Mostly just because of that stereotype, though. Then again, I'm not sure the girls I know are exactly... erm... representative of the general female population.
SApprentice 34
Most of the other females I've been friends with have always been into anime and hentai, and the related fanart. I feel like it's probably as common for girls as it is for boys, I just think it's not talked about as much. I mean, women like **** and sex related things too, it's just not really socially acceptable for many other people to know that.
happle 21
Everyone has their own sexual affinities, and hentai isn't any more or less "weird" than a foot fetish. Every person has their likes and dislikes, however outlandish they are.
ballerinaaub 17
67 by "lots of ass" do you mean male or female?
MrPlopper 9
114-aburro (donkey)
kemando 22
Your comment is full of ignorance.
winkydog4056 16
#67_Make sure you use a raincoat and LOTS of lube dearie
Snoopy0718 14
129- un burro*
letmehavemytea 21
Girls like **** too :D I don't know about hentai though, that's all that tentacle stuff right...? :$
twitch851 9
193, not really, there's non Hentai tentacle ****, but not all Hentai is like that, mostly is manga or anime ****.
onlychildFTW 34
It's not tentacles really. There's some of that. But most is just girls and guys. Or girls and girls. Like regular **** but in anime form.
FML_Whale 18
67- Wait so you get a lot of ass? Are you a toilet? Cause it would also explain how you're full of shit.
mfmylifesrsly 30
#52 hey now, hentai has some pretty hot stuff! and i'm a girl!
Gman1234gman 7
38 your right how would you get that even started OP????
fmelots 9
I agree with 52, and I am also female.
laurenlovesjb 20
Well at least you got something accomplished right? Haha but no seriously, someone out there will love you. Just put yourself out there and MOST IMPORTANTLY, just be yourself. :)
RaggleFrock 13
What exactly did he accomplish?
citymayer 7
Figuring out why they will never get girlfriends.. They're too busy having pity parties for two.
aussieaccents 7
Did justin bieber teach you that?
Rosicles 8
I'd say possibly just a positive outlook may have taught her that. Getting very tired of the bieber stabs this girls getting thrown her way.. Old news hey?
hinchkongfang 0
Maybe he's single because all the girls his age are saving themselves for Justin bieber - I bet OP wishes girls likes bieber less and Japanese animated **** more...
weveevee 3
That being said, you might want to leave out the Henti and sex dolls out on the first date.
eur0 14
Now you can be forever alone together with your friend.
nop200 3
In this case it may be better to not be theirselves...
msjoyfull84 0
I'm also sick of all the flack this girls getting for being a belieber. Who cares what type of music she likes?
onlychildFTW 34
I thought people were over the JB stuff. That is so a few years ago.
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
What. The. ****?
Inheritance 10
My thought exactly. Next they will be watching hentai **** together. Getting some male bonding in sulking about their sad love life.
brackaman 18
I'd say forever alone, but they do have each other. I suppose they could have fun discussing how they could have been getting girls for years to come.
PandaKitteh 20
Together alone. :]
mduffy08 8
3 - **** the what? :3
mheck06 6
How the hell did this story get approved to be posted?
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
I'm more disturbed by the fact that the OP took the time to use a name like that. Is it a legitimate account?
twitch851 9
I know right! That was so awesome!
onlychildFTW 34
Please tell me what this comment said! I want to know!!!
jackinfrost 1
Aannnnnd kiss
angeluv_2014 22
That's what I'm saying! I almost expected this FML to end with "and it was at this moment that we realized we didn't need girls because, we were, in fact, perfect for eachother".
monstersocks 5
then it wouldn't be such an fml b/c they found love.
DCvRkey2012 7
If they found love, would it be in a hopeless place?
morella_xx 29
Considering they were having this conversation online, yes. The Internet is usually a hopeless place.
andiewithlove 21
159 - It was a very stupid song reference. (As in the song is stupid, not the comment. The comment was good.)
spud11763 14
And they found Dove in a soapless place
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
182- even if he did know that 159 could have still made his comment..
Welshite 40
...and you wonder why you're single...
lilhellian 27
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Don't worry Op we all have our fetishes.. I'll admit to looking at hentai before..
lilhellian 27
*Tucks my tail and goes to my doggy bed* *does puppy dog eyes*
lilhellian 27
Yay *rubs against your leg* :)
angeluv_2014 22
Y'all's creepy puppy shit cracked me up lol
jetsown08 21
Inb4 puppy/penguin ***********
jdmur 6
PenguinBitch I love your picture so much!
lukemack 4
Hentai is awesome
chellyX92 8
I'm a chick and sometimes I stumble upon hentai every now and then. ;)
priceyfml 7
Kinky
lilhellian 27
Of course you sometimes watch hentai.. Your pikachu. :)
kurodansei 16
chelly "stumbles" onto hentai sometimes lol
chellyX92 8
You know how it goes google the quantum theory and BAM tentacles. No? Might be a virus on my comp then....
kemando 22
Fakku anyone? lol. :D
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I'm a chick, and I ******* love hentai.
lilhellian 27
138 Marry me?:O lol
PokemonLove993 17
hentai is the best I admit I like it so much better than actual **** and yes I am a girl
LiyIa_fml 8
Same here 155.
BiChelsea 6
I think the reason all of us girls like it is cause we can pair any two people (or more/less) and BAM! Instant self sexy time :D
KiddNYC1O 22
Those hentai chicks should exist. Their boobs are perfect.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
145) I dunno how a Pomeranian chipmunk would look. Probably ******* adorible.
Fanain 2
I know the reason I watch hentai over "regular ****" is because watching two real people having sex feels like I'm some pervert looking into their sex life. Also I found the girls and plot lines degrading. At least in hentai I know it didn't actually effect anyone.
GothickNihilist 15
If any of you like hentai , try playing eroge. For those who don't know eroge are visual novels that reward you with Hentai scenes. If you want to try it Google jlist they have them in both Japanese and English. Glad to be of help to anyone.
jojimugo 20
Did not know women were into hentai **** like that
ChocolateScyther 19
Well of course, 194, how else do you explain all the yaoi
verkaderk 9
Whatever floats your boat dude. Hentai reminds me of pickachu though
MissMae93 23
10 - How is naked Anime girls being sexually pleasured/assaulted by random (usually alien-esque) objects anywhere remotely close to Pikachu?
lilhellian 27
74 Hentai is broader then what your describing.. It covers anime and cartoons.. Pokemon is a cartoon..
MissMae93 23
95 - Sorry, I'm not an expert.
angeluv_2014 22
Then why are you bitching verkaderk out for his original comment? It sounded to me like an experianced veiwer got offended by his blatent misinterpritation of what 'hentai' is really all about... *eyebrows*
MissMae93 23
106 - More so trying to keep my childhood (Pokemon) as innocent as possible.
MrPlopper 9
Silvercartoon.com *shudders*
GODert 8
74 let me explain this as easy as possible Hentai is anime like full metal alchemist or Pokemon, however Hentai is **** so in a variety of Hentai they will have Pokemon **** or Naruto that is why 10 had said Hentai reminds him of Pokemon because it is anime and is used as ****.
Rhysviri 10
126 - That's like saying that Fifty Shades of Grey is a book, so therefore The Cat in the Hat is related to Fifty Shades of Grey. :|
bahamut357 16
Hentai is any **** done in an anime or manga style. This sadly includes Pokemon. Remember: rule 34, if it exists, there is **** of it.
xXxSCREAMxXx 3
125 Just ruined my child hood...
verkaderk 9
Don't be hatin. Just like whenever I hear "pizza delivery!" I think of cheesy **** scenes, whenever I hear hentai **** I think of Pokemon. It's really my only knowledge of anything hentai
teresee 8
I don't think I understood most of that FML
magicbananas3 6
I'm going to guess and say that's because you're what? 10? 11?
teresee 8
LOL ok let's go with that. Sounds better.