Today, I was chatting to a friend on Facebook about girls, and why we're single. We somehow ended up admitting to one another that we'd never get girlfriends, finding out that we both like hentai porn, and trading info on Japanese sex toys. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I made a friend on an online chat. We got along fairly well and even traded Facebook accounts. I found out that the two of us had a lot of very surprising things in common. We were the same age, we were from the same school, and we even had the same boyfriend. FML
Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments, and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML
Today, I was half paying attention to a text message conversation with someone about how addicted we both were to social media. It's wasn't until deep into the conversation that I realized we were actually talking about porn. FML
Today, my friends and I were acting out porn scenes without sex. Then, I realized that we all watch too much porn, and we are still all virgins. FML
Today, I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites. Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked pictures of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls. His excuse? "I have friends on there." FML
Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML
Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML
Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML
Today, I had lunch with an old friend I've had a crush on for years. We're both single, so I figured it to be kind of like a date. Until he started talking about how he told his brother last night that we would never be a thing. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML
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Top comments
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
And that's why...
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
What. The. ****?
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Comments (235)
blackblood94 7
Well that escalated quickly...
PokemonLove993 17
go to an anime convention you'll get plenty of girls then. trust me, my friends and I go to them all the time :)
kemando 22
I love cons, i dislike the ratio of sweaty fat guys to attractive females though... And usually every attractive female is there with a boyfriend/girlfriend. -.- ah well at least I got to meet Jessica Nigri. lol
charvisioku 22
I see your point but at the cons I've been to nobody's out to find a partner. Sure, it can happen, but I wouldn't say you'd be more likely to pull at an anime con than anywhere else. I'd personally find it a little bit annoying if someone came onto me at an anime con since I'm there to watch the masquerade and buy cool shit. I don't want a flock of guys following me around trying it on with me. It's crowded enough already. Unless there's an after party - I suppose it's fairly likely people would get together at that since everyone's usually circulating and talking.
Mauskau 36
Word of advice, when you meet a girl, never mention the Hentai and don't let her find it. You may even have to stop for a while because it does freak a lot of people out.
CharresBarkrey 16
You should really read previous comments before you make an ignorant generalization like this. I don't enjoy hentai, but I don't give a flying **** if my boyfriend does.
Fanain 2
161- To each their own. If your going to judge your significant other on the sexual things their into how can you expect them to be the real them? Relationships are built on trust. It's not like they're saying "the only way I get off is with the human centipede" it's hentai and toys. Makes sex more fun. Don't knock it till you try it.
lsdecaria1 5
Circle jerk
saffy66 34
Cause and effect...
souljacker 11
I am a girl and I LOVE hentai!
zenrael 21
You won't get a gf for a few reasons. Already haven given up. Blaming your problems on things other than yourself. And for being able to admit all of that over the Internet on fb. Gtfo out of the basement. Hentai rocks, I have a girlfriend. Try getting to know someone.
itsame0987 18
At least you had a productive conversation.
winkydog4056 16
Your parents must be so proud!
nirenna 6
At least you're not alone.