Today, I was chatting to a friend on Facebook about girls, and why we're single. We somehow ended up admitting to one another that we'd never get girlfriends, finding out that we both like hentai porn, and trading info on Japanese sex toys. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I made a friend on an online chat. We got along fairly well and even traded Facebook accounts. I found out that the two of us had a lot of very surprising things in common. We were the same age, we were from the same school, and we even had the same boyfriend. FML
Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments, and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML
Today, I was half paying attention to a text message conversation with someone about how addicted we both were to social media. It's wasn't until deep into the conversation that I realized we were actually talking about porn. FML
Today, my friends and I were acting out porn scenes without sex. Then, I realized that we all watch too much porn, and we are still all virgins. FML
Today, I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites. Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked pictures of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls. His excuse? "I have friends on there." FML
Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML
Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML
Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML
Today, I had lunch with an old friend I've had a crush on for years. We're both single, so I figured it to be kind of like a date. Until he started talking about how he told his brother last night that we would never be a thing. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML
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Top comments
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
And that's why...
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
What. The. ****?
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Comments (235)
EduJav321 24
What I like the most is OP's name
ropeandneck 7
bwahahahaha I didn't see it before you mention it, that made my day x)
winkydog4056 16
Oh crap, here we go again. Winky is kindly asking wtf hentai **** is?
lilhellian 27
go to google images safe search off.. Type in rule 34 scooby doo
winkydog4056 16
#53_Winky does NOT yahooooooo! Since you don't know either, Winky will google it. Thank you for your help.
Sinkhole 26
Sinkhole doesn't understand why winkydog always talks in third person.
Welshite 40
Welshite doesn't need to Google stuff. Welshite's just that good.
Welshite 40
Welshite invites Noor to join. ;)
Life_sucks_13 6
Hentai is the form of Anime (Japanese animation) straight (guy on girl) ****. There are other forms. Yuri (girl on girl) and Yaoi (guy on guy)
SparrowMint 11
I'm the girl version of you. We are out there... just in hiding. Pettanko and Monstergirl Ftw.
tj5810 21
There's someone out there for everyone. Just find someone who you find attractive and is into the same things that you are. Everything else is just details.
rott3n 6
Maybe you two should hook up?
winkydog4056 16
Hmmmm, Japanese sexy toys. What exactly falls under this category!? P.S. Winky does NOT need to yahooooo or google sex toys. Winky just didn't know sex toys were racially divided.
lilhellian 27
Tentacle shaped ******?
showmeyourears 19
My like of hentai never stopped me from getting a boyfriend. My boyfriend is even aware of it and still stays with me.
lilhellian 27
I am a little jealous of that lucky bastard. xD.. Most girls I find that are into that are lesbians..
kemando 22
72- yep, I heard that. There's more lesbians around than I was aware, nothing wrong with it, but that's more balls out of my court, so to speak.
Kaerunoutof 3
Wait. I'm Japanese. Do those toys peculiar to Japan!? I think it is normal and sometimes I use. But I have a girlfriend. So it's not the reason you and he don't have the girlfriend. And if you can speak Japanese fluently, you get a girlfriend or do the sex easily, so come on.
lilhellian 27
Are you trying to tell him to get a japanese *****?
noncom 12
Eh, who can blame you? Hentai **** is interesting, fascinating, and sexy.
alera_fml 12
I admit I'm an awful yaoi fan. My hubby loves me anyways.