Today, I almost got run over on my bike by a truck who raced through a red light. After narrowly avoiding a collision, the car slowed down. Instead of apologizing for almost killing me, the driver stuck his head out of the window and yelled, "Nice ass!" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML
Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, I was driving to work and stopped at a stop light. A full 2 or 3 seconds passed, followed by a car rear-ending me. The idiot driving it got out and gave me hell, calling me a maniac because I braked "too quickly" and didn't give him a chance to react. FML
Today, I got rear ended. The guy flashed his lights at me to pull over, so I pulled into the side of the road. He drove away. FML
Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML
Today, I was driving in my very own car that I bought and paid for myself, when I stopped at a stop light. Then I noticed the truck in front of me turn on his reverse lights. I honked desperately. He hits me, looks out the window and says, "I see no damage" and drives away. FML
Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML
Today, I got hit by a car while going out for a jog. As I writhed on the floor in pain, I heard the driver say, “Sorry!” and the sound of tires squealing. He’d sped off. I didn’t get a chance to get his license plate. FML
Today, some genius shot through a red light, hitting my car and nearly killing me. When I went to ask if he was okay, the first words out of his mouth were, "I hope you have insurance". FML
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Top comments
Zestus 19
so you were the victim of a hit on and run?
Branflakes78 13
At least you got a Nice Ass!?
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Comments (99)
HumanWiki 8
Considering how many cyclists I see blatantly ignoring all traffic signs, I have 0 sympathy for you.
squideth 18
Yeah cause car owners are never horrible drivers, ever, right? What the **** is wrong with you? So, because she rides a bicycle, she deserves to be run over? Please do everyone a favour and NEVER DRIVE.
Keattles 14
Gaayyyyyyyyyyy
andruszko 2
I was going to say "at least you got a compliment out of it." But instead have to call out these hypocrites saying that complimenting a physical feature of a woman is "sexist" and "piggish." Which is pure stupidity. I mean, you're not even being ignorant...just stupid (hint: google the defintions.) Women compliment men on physical features all the time, and vice versa. While I don't come out so blatantly and say things like this, guess what? Women do to me all the time and I don't go off crying about it or accusing them of objectifying me. Yelling "great ass" out of the window is classless. It's not sexist, and not necessarily objectifying either. Learn the difference then come back and preach just because nobody in real life cares about or is attracted to you.
RedPillSucks 31
Women are less likely to sexually objectify men as men do women. If you don't think yelling "nice ass" to someone you almost ran over is sexual objectification, as well as being classless then you might also need to spend some time with google.
lalaney 14
What effects a woman's discomfort at receiving these so called "compliments" that have to do with assessing her sexual worth and reducing her to a piece of meat, is the possibility that it's a precursor to rape. The women who apparently flirtatiously compliment parts of your body (if that is true) probably don't give you a sense of endangerment. You probably still feel in control of the situation. The next time a large, beefy man, twice the size of you, leers down at you and growls in your ear "Nice ass", you might begin to understand the fear that goes through a woman's mind.
lalaney 14
And it is objectifying, to a comical degree. She wasn't a human being that he almost killed, she was a floating piece of ass attached to a bike. That's pure objectification.
siggy_mcsigx 22
I don't know a woman who would yell out in public to a complete stranger and compliment a man on a physical body part (unless it's her job, or she was drunk after a night of partying). Being honked or hollered at or stared at is an uncomfortable experience, and it's unusual that a woman would honk and holler.
Mademoiselle_fml 34
If you're not a woman who has been sexually objectified then you have no right to an opinion on the matter. Period. You don't know what it feels like, and therefore you have no right to judge.
awsomegiz 8
I guess canadians aren't as nice as stories make them.
Poetaster 10
When your ass is so nice you almost cause car accidents.....Daym Girl!!
JustinKirby 20
Be proud OP, your ass is so impressive it nearly causes accidents!
Bevspeaks 11
Good god, he nearly kills you but says you have a nice ass...what a doucheshittingpuppynozzle.
PenguinBitch 43
Next time don't take your donkey on bike rides. I'll be distracted too.
lrak 6
Prove it
kaykay2922 11
Happens in Alberta, too. I fell when rollerblading when something like this happened to me.