Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML
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By
mikeydakid59
| 0
FEED THE SHARK!
By
gregoriit
| 4
i would say you life sucks, but no sucking seems to be going on, so am not sure what to press. =(
COMMENTS
By
mikeydakid59
| 0
FEED THE SHARK!
Reply
frankq555
| 3
haha
Reply
cotter96
| 0
haha
Reply
hahayousucks
| 3
lol jaws dies... so slap it around a few times, it'll die
Reply
DropTheDaggerxx
| 31
That's amazing.
Reply
meowmeowwkitty
| 0
def not a FML if he's hot, get someee
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meowmeowwkitty
| 0
or if you love him ofcourse ;)
Reply
actingbro
| 3
I like 143's point of view, it's kinda hot
Reply
bariforlife
| 0
lol hahaha
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neftajr
| 0
open wide!
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UrDunSon
| 0
wait shouldn't she be the shark?
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DearlyBeloved20
| 3
Yeah the shark will swallow you whole
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Pawned71
| 0
throw a harpoon at it before it eats u!!!!
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xoxoMEGANxoxo
| 13
lmao
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TayonaC
| 10
ok now that wasn't funny
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rawrgle
| 7
You better eat the shark before it eats you.
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yourmomsvagina
| 5
Lol
By
gregoriit
| 4
i would say you life sucks, but no sucking seems to be going on, so am not sure what to press. =(
Reply
banana_buddy
| 6
LMAO Gregor nice one.
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SkateElement44
| 0
Why was she out of the kitchen? Did someone put a couch in there?
Reply
kappaaa
| 12
#127.. you're a tossa.
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snowfox_fml
| 10
don't be a sexist douche 127
By
musiclover087
| 0
WTF?!?!
Reply
docscientist
| 9
At least he didn't pull a fly out of his penis.
Reply
insanesna1l
| 0
ba dum cha! should have grabbed his balls and told him to keep it zipped up until you say otherwise
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ashley471
| 0
win ^
By
yesiyes
| 0
LOOOOL,hes a keeper! :D
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mightymart
| 5
wow get a Life 151..
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NickK49
| 0
Where did that come from 169?
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yesiyes
| 0
ok?151 soundss kindaaa creepy.. :O
dammit i dont get the fisherman humor-___-
dammit i dont get the fisherman humor-___-
Reply
lokita5
| 0
I know rite!! :)
By
Foltzie
| 0
I play that game with my gf all the time. She loves it
Reply
vadroman
| 0
she is a wife type. marry her!
Reply
daaron
| 3
I agree if u don't I will
Reply
patty96
| 0
wow really??
By
SEC_Owns
| 0
Sounds like a bamf boyfriend!
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ImaginaryFoe
| 0
I have to agree. Unless you were having the shittiest day ever, this is funny and sweet, in a sick way. If your senses of humour are so incompatible that you feel this is an FML, you're probably not going to last long as a couple.
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SEC_Owns
| 0
Well said!^
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ifmlftw
| 0
is that a pig?
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Lallafa
| 0
I wish I could give this post more thumbs up...
By
amerwin
| 3
You should have given him some hammerhead.
Reply
hedgerow
| 0
and some great white as reward
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ahhitsjessi88
| 0
hahhaha! (:
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jellybean91
| 12
wow
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Rileysmiley1996
| 0
haha thats funny
Reply
batummshakalaka
| 1
lol
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CaptSkippy
| 9
she should have eaten the shark...
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TheNewGuy03
| 28
...and she will have some great white as a reward, if she doesn't bite!
|the kid|
|the kid|
Reply
Squeaknique
| 2
Heh..those comments are /oozing/ with win...
By
Rei_Ayanami
| 18
Normally I would find that rather ignorant, but it's actually quite funny.
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lemoncows
| 2
you're so ignorant you can't even use the term ignorant correctly.
Reply
defQ
| 0
Hahahaha ultra win ^^^^
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Rei_Ayanami
| 18
Allow me to rephrase my comment, "Normally I call somebody who did that ignorant" of course meaning ignorant to what people will and will not tolerate.
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ERich331
| 3
how does that make him ignorant?
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jrsgreenfire257
| 0
haha
By
dannyburge
| 1
i would like to high five your boyfriend
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obviouslyimdrunk
| 0
but his hand was on his.....mmkay
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punkrulz
| 1
I would imagine there is a good chance he has two hands... or could wash them after the hilarity has ensued. Personally I'm sure everyone touches their privates at some point during the day but what do I know. I wanna high five this guy too!
Reply
TheDeadlyBones
| 0
hey!!! maybe this guy wants to high five that guys mmkay hand!!! or his mmkay itself!!! who knows!!! XP
By
DocBastard
| 38
Would you say your boyfriend was a Great White or a guppy?
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iliketurdles
| 7
what if he's black?
I know, I'm terrible but I'm sorry, I couldn't help my self.
I know, I'm terrible but I'm sorry, I couldn't help my self.
Reply
TaylorTotsYumm
| 10
And if he's Asian..
Lemon shark.
Lemon shark.
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lol_ironic_life
| 9
lol what about a bamboo shark for Asian?
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iloveboyswittats
| 10
Captain obvious
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Kelita
| 0
WELL op did say FML at the end soooo I'm guessin he's a guppy.....
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ZTB13
| 4
It's not the size of the shark... It's the motion if the ocean.
Reply
dakins
| 0
lol