Miscellaneous: Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really...

By ashhatches - 27/06/2011 19:15 - United States

Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really hot guy walking over. Trying to be sexy, I bit my hotdog cutely and winked. I ended up choking and dropping the ketchup covered hotdog all over my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 422

You deserved it 62 537

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Same thing different taste

Hi-de-hi

By Droolgirl - 26/05/2009 01:25 - United States

Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 252

You deserved it 46 556

By M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 601

You deserved it 56 763

By alisaav - 08/08/2014 07:40 - Thailand

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 264

You deserved it 13 644

By pootythe5th - 30/08/2009 18:09 - United States

Today, I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I realized my really cute waiter, along with his buddies kept looking at me and smiling. Trying to be cool, I took a bite of my burrito, choked, and spilled ground beef down my new shirt and in my bra. They laughed the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 534

You deserved it 38 661

By embarassed - 12/10/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 490

You deserved it 6 820

By Weak Disposition - 27/04/2012 04:29 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I entered a hotdog eating contest. I made it up to two, threw up on the rest of them, and fell over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 311

You deserved it 29 609

Choked

By embarrassing - 15/07/2021 18:01

Today, I went out to eat with friends. My crush was also at the restaurant with his friends. He smiled at me as I took a mouthful of food, and I choked. The waitress had to perform the Heimlich maneuver on me, while he and his friends fell off their chairs laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 155

By splitzville - 16/03/2010 20:12 - United States

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 962

You deserved it 40 860

By fuckendog - 25/07/2014 06:05 - Australia - Virginia

Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 228

You deserved it 55 764

By Anonymous - 05/12/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 204

You deserved it 67 173

GloriousWhorious 6

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:01

YDI for being overly flirty.

lopez1222 3

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:01

hahaha not cute...

Comments

rileynautumn 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 19:35

costco+hotdog=everything but cute. stop thinking you're so damn hot and just keep stuffing your face. ydi

LaughingGod 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 21:08

How the hell were you intending that to be flirty? "See me biting off part of this phallic object? If you're lucky, this could be you!"

patacus 14

Tuesday 28 June 2011 21:24

i want to say ydi but that would ruin the 7777 good luck of this fml. so i guess its a fyl.

droxd923 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 21:46

try not being a pervert next time?

budd28 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 21:55

thats what you get for trying to b cute

ninidunut 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 0:04

how the hell do you 'cutely' bite a hot dog..

ChristaJoanne 1

Wednesday 29 June 2011 0:12

I've done that same exact thing except I was at target & I was eating a pretzel xD

soulfulemo 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 0:52

maybe you should've tried biting it uglily...cutely biting causes choking, as you may have noticed.

Tumadre1111 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 1:01

Were did u said the tacos were?

electricmaster 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 1:05

Maybe he thinks "blood" is hot? :D

Keywords

Singing Miscellaneous Embarrassing Roommate Music TV shows Animals Dogs Relatable Sports Weird Love AITA Cheating Death Awkward Annoying Family Doctor Health Work Capitalism Money Drunk Friends Concert Coworkers Intimacy Sextoys Pranks

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I agree, your life sucks 40 740

You deserved it 4 439

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You deserved it 31 011

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You deserved it 103

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You deserved it 2 366

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I agree, your life sucks 24 072

You deserved it 7 016

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I agree, your life sucks 36 642

You deserved it 6 428

Same thing different taste

Hi-de-hi

Choked

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