Miscellaneous: Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really...

By ashhatches - 27/06/2011 19:15 - United States

Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really hot guy walking over. Trying to be sexy, I bit my hotdog cutely and winked. I ended up choking and dropping the ketchup covered hotdog all over my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 422

You deserved it 62 537

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Same thing different taste

Hi-de-hi

By Droolgirl - 26/05/2009 01:25 - United States

Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 252

You deserved it 46 556

By M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 601

You deserved it 56 763

By alisaav - 08/08/2014 07:40 - Thailand

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 264

You deserved it 13 644

By pootythe5th - 30/08/2009 18:09 - United States

Today, I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I realized my really cute waiter, along with his buddies kept looking at me and smiling. Trying to be cool, I took a bite of my burrito, choked, and spilled ground beef down my new shirt and in my bra. They laughed the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 534

You deserved it 38 661

By embarassed - 12/10/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 490

You deserved it 6 820

By Weak Disposition - 27/04/2012 04:29 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I entered a hotdog eating contest. I made it up to two, threw up on the rest of them, and fell over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 311

You deserved it 29 609

Choked

By embarrassing - 15/07/2021 18:01

Today, I went out to eat with friends. My crush was also at the restaurant with his friends. He smiled at me as I took a mouthful of food, and I choked. The waitress had to perform the Heimlich maneuver on me, while he and his friends fell off their chairs laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 155

By splitzville - 16/03/2010 20:12 - United States

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 962

You deserved it 40 860

By fuckendog - 25/07/2014 06:05 - Australia - Virginia

Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 228

You deserved it 55 764

By Anonymous - 05/12/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 204

You deserved it 67 173

GloriousWhorious 6

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:01

YDI for being overly flirty.

lopez1222 3

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:01

hahaha not cute...

Comments

docscientist 9

Tuesday 28 June 2011 9:46

That was you? lol.

lisha88 1

Tuesday 28 June 2011 9:56

that's hot lol

slickshun 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 10:09

thats for sucking dick

glitchedgamer 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 12:38

There is no way to eat a hotdog cutely. Besides, I'd be creeped out if a girl winked at me as she bit something phallic and ate it.

J9DeeZy 4

Tuesday 28 June 2011 12:56

how do you eat a hotdog cutely? can you?

dyschordia 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 13:51

Hahahaha - Gotta love it when a bimbo displays ineptitude in public =) And yes - that was definitely a bimbo move...

Igor_g5 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 14:36

Who puts ketchup on a hot dog?

llamakidderp 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 15:00

#14, maybe because you're not good looking? Jussssst saying :P

p33lzhear 6

Tuesday 28 June 2011 15:12

ydi for putting ketchup on your hotdog

Sarojin 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 15:26

sexy and eating a Costco hotdog. what planet are you living on where those two things go together. ydi

Keywords

Embarrassing Miscellaneous Roommate Music Singing Dogs Animals Relatable TV shows Love Cheating AITA Sports Weird Death Family Awkward Annoying Health Doctor Money Work Capitalism Drunk Concert Friends Coworkers Sextoys Intimacy Pranks

The Top

Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 753

You deserved it 6 272

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend when we came across the most beautiful piece of Japanese furniture. When I inspected it closely, my boyfriend started laughing. Turns out I was making the same noise I make when I orgasm in reaction to a piece of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 911

You deserved it 4 868

The Top

Today, my best friend informed me that he had lost his virginity to my sister, which I already knew. However, he told me the location. My room. While I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 151

Today, I'm staying with my grandma and her older sister while my parents are away. It's been two hours and so far they've popped vicodins, talked about banging Alex Trebek, and had a farting contest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 607

You deserved it 4 377

Today, my fiancé called and hung up right after I answered. He called back 5 minutes later demanding to know the name of the man who answered my phone. This "man" was me. I have bronchitis. Yes, he's aware of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 630

You deserved it 2 648

Today, my sister offered me a couple of doughnuts she bought recently. Thinking she was just being nice, I went ahead and started eating, and was met with the most horrid taste I've ever experienced. Turns out her "recently" was two weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 705

You deserved it 2 153

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. It's okay, I know who the father is: my ex-boyfriend, who moved to Japan last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 056

You deserved it 12 026

Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 082

You deserved it 4 319

Same thing different taste

Hi-de-hi

Choked

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