By Fefe - 13/07/2010 02:43 - United States
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Well, the internet is magically in that it can completely change the way people act and has a little special feature called 'being anonymous'. Now, this feature is absolutely AMAZING because people can say stuff that they couldn't in real life. Isn't it just mind blowing?
Having an Anxiety Disorder is extremely hard to live with. For people that don't have to experience it, it's easy to judge. I've dealt with GAD for a good portion of my life and it's frustrating when I can't take control of my own thoughts or actions. Although medication is helpful it's still a struggle to wake up in the morning, knowing your mind is about to kick into 3rd gear. I feel bad for you OP, because I've been there. It's hard to make friends and even harder to keep them. People generally don't want to stick around someone that doesn't possess the same social qualities a "normal" person should. I struggled to keep friends and to this day I have a hard time mantaining my personal life. I wish more people would educate themselves on things of this nature. It's not only interesting but it's beneficial.
Poor #75, we completely forgot that nobody else has any struggles that they have to deal with. People with social anxieties have issues but they should not be treated any differently than anyone else. EVERYONE has their own personal struggle. Some people are socially anxious, some people have manic and depressive episodes, and some people have irrational rituals they must follow. These people should learn to deal with their problems and not expect special sympathy from other people. You ARE in charge of your own thoughts and actions. If you're not, you should be locked away. Medication, while beneficial, teaches people that they don't have to deal with their own struggles and they should let drugs do it for them. I did not mean to downplay #75's "disorder" as I am sure she's a wonderful person who has to overcome a lot of problems (no sarcasm), but it's upsetting that so many people have to rely on medications to handle their problems... oh dear, I wonder how the people in 1700 lived without Adderal and Zantac. Unfortunately they're all dead now but I will have to assume they survived somehow.
I have never been and never will be the kind of person that sees my struggles as being worse then someone else's. Medication does not always work for people but, it helped me. Being locked away is not always the answer and I am certainly not someone that needs to be locked up. You're not clear on what I meant by "not being in control of your thoughts or actions." I'm not saying that my every thought and my every move is out of my hands. When presented with certain situations, I would react by getting anxious, it's involuntary and something I couldn't help. I have gained so much control over my disorder and I've done it because of will power and yes, medication. I can't always control my thoughts, in the sense that, I would worry about nothing, I would get upset over something small and I would lash out for no reason. I see where you're coming from but, what works for one may not work for another. I'm one of the few people I know that doesn't expect sympathy from other people. It is ok sometimes to share your personal struggles with people because, it may give someone else the strength to reach out and get help. I have never been ashamed of who I am or afraid to give my opinion. Some people respect it, some people don't. I have sympathy for OP because I relate to her but, my sympathy doesn't stop at people whom I relate to. I have an immense amount of compassion for anyone that struggles. I honestly appreciate your input though and I respect you for not being a mindless jerk.
Oh no, it was nothing about you at all. I was using your disorder as an example. Some people fully understand their problem and take control of it very nicely, like you do. I was talking about the many people I know that use their "bipolar" and "asphergers (dear god no idea how to spell that" and "ADHD" as excuses for their behaviors. They brag about having to take medication and therapy. "Oh I'm sorry, excuse me, I have ________" is their EXCUSE for an inappropriate action. They whine and cry and demand sympathy and special treatment. Some of them even act like they couldn't live without medication. THAT is what bothers me, not the ones who CAN take control of themselves. I feel honored to have earned your respect. :)
In my opinion, The Jersey Shore cast is pathetic. They're the ones in need of a life. Hope they are enjoying there fame, they're bound to disapear along the way. They're stupid pointless drama makes for a great laugh. Don't worry about it OP I;m sure you'll eventually get over your social anxiety. Just don't let it take over your life, try getting out a bit more. :)
I agree. ADHD is so commonly overdiagnosed and many people take their disorders and throw them around. It's sad to see how many people take advantage of something others try so hard to fight off. I used to work with criminals and I gained a high tolerance to bullshit, when it comes to disorders. It's a crutch for many people, especially people that have done something wrong. It's an excuse that to many people use. Of course there's a large portion of people that don't but, all in all, I know exactly where you're coming from. I would administer tests to sex offenders quite often and I distinctly remember one man (I use that term loosely) that claimed his actions were forced out because of his depression. I would cut off my own foot before starting to believe such non-sense.
I think you should have said "I'm sorry sir but we don't tolerate whiny bullshit in this facility." I am sorry that you have to put up with so many criminals like that. :( I hope you're at least paid well for it. Disorders cease to be disorders when everybody has them...
105, thank you. I don't work there anymore. It was an eye opening experience and it definately gave me an upper hand at understanding the human mind. Honestly, it was the most fascinating place to work, while being the toughest place to work. I have an understanding that unfortunately a lot of people don't. It's so hard to comprehend why some people do the things they do unless, you've stuck around long enough to find out or, been around it enough. There are a lot of overdiagnosed diseases and that's something that will never go away but, there are people out there that deserve recognition for their disorders.
That's why I wish people would at least try and understand a disorder. Not everybody is looking for attention. I know how my body and mind work. There's not a soul on earth that can tell me my actions are "made up" because, I suffer through it. Some people tend to be ignorant on subjects like these.
Uneducated? Excuse me sir/miss, but I will have you know what several of my friends and family members have these "disorders" and I have studied them in two different psychology courses and read articles about them online. While I admit my approach isn't very sympathetic, it is not uneducated. I would like you to do your OWN research first before you make judgments about others. One of my friends who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder has managed to live a fairly normal life without medication, and with minimal therapy. He has learned to deal. Thank you for your "constructive" criticism but I find my "uneducated" opinion unchanged.
I'm with pendatik on this one... Umbreon, you claim to have done two different psychology courses, so unless you have a doctorate (clinical or philosophical), your should know that your opinion is not acknowledged, and your lack of research into the area makes in invalid. So please be quiet before you make yourself sound more stupid. And yes, you do come across as uneducated. Anyone who has studied clinical psychology or psychiatry will know that what you talk about is pure bullshit and derived from the media. Please re-think your harsh judgments and perhaps gain some true life experience.
@89: You're an idiot. You've obviously never dealt with any of those types of problems. Medication doesn't deal with the problem for you, it just makes it manageable. Many people who are on medications like that still have to go to therapy and learn to deal with every day life, which is unbelievably hard when you have a mental disorder. Also, being "locked away" doesn't do anything. Most psychiatric hospitals are short-term, and the first thing they do when they meet patients is put them on medication to help them with their problems. Stop being ignorant and talking about things you obviously know nothing about.
Oh yeah I forgot. Apparently I'm uneducated unless I actually have the disease. My opinion is NOT RENDERED INVALID. You people are the ones who think that your sympathy is right and everyone else is wrong. TRUE I don't have a disorder, and TRUE I don't have a doctorate in psychology, but with my limited knowledge and limited life experience I am allowed the "narrow" opinion that I have. My opinion is in no way self-centered as it has absolutely nothing to do with me. I won't cry a thousand tears of sympathy for this person who would rather watch a washed-up television show than deal with their problem. I never said people with real disorders don't have a hard time. I acknowledge that they do. The 1700s thing was a joke, sir. It was an attempt to lighten the mood to keep people like you from telling me that my opinion is RIGHT or WRONG. I know my reasons, and my facts, behind my opinion and I refuse to change it. I don't have to know what having a disorder is like to know nothing about it. I am dealing with my own just fine and have never taken a pill. I did say that medicine was beneficial but is all too often taken as a means to completely zombify someone (example: my brother and his ADHD medication, and my exboyfriend and those funny looking pills he took for bipolar. They became zombies after taking them) I apologize for disagreeing with you. I hope that next time we can all be mature and not resort to name-calling.
oh, and tendawik or whatever your name is.....my opinion is NEVER RENDERED INVALID. THAT is what I call stupidity right there. If I had to pass it off as fact, and my research was incomplete, then it is invalid. As an opinion, it is FULLY VALID. An opinion is the way I FEEL based off of what I know. I can have an opinion too even if I don't happen to have a particular disorder.
pendatik is spot-on, and FFML is right in a lot of what she says, too. Medication isn't a magical fix for a lot of anxious or depressive people, but it's often ONE of many necessary tools needed to regain functionality. Most SSRIs/antidepressants elevate your mood enough to deal with your problems through other means, like therapy, sleep, proper nutrition and exercise, etc. Some people with permanent dysfunctions like bi-polar disorder will probably need to take them on a long-term basis because their bodies can't acheive a liveable balance through other means. Sure, many others could get off of them by putting in the work and don't, but the problem is not always laziness. American health care (and maybe Western medicine in general, I'm not sure) has a very acute/short-term outlook, and sometimes people don't do the other work because they're never properly educated by the prescribing doctors, or the biggie-- they can't afford things like talk therapy, sleep clinics, complementary therapies etc. that aren't as readily covered by insurance as pills. Our healthcare system is set up to enforce the idea that swallowing pills should fix all your problems. And no, seeing family members struggle with these issues does NOT make you educated. I won't even dignify the web research mention with an argument-- that's laughable. Lastly, you describe people using their disorders/medications as an excuse. Of course there will be some who do that. But the truth is, there are MANY others-- likely the majority-- who have the same disorders and take the same long-term meds who still assume personal responsibility. They just keep quiet about it, so you don't have a chance to compare them to the twits. Thus, your only impression is made by the extremists, and you develop a warped view of an entire group of people. IMO, that's like considering all Muslims as terrorists, because the average kind, peaceable Muslim doesn't make it on the evening news. It's a ridiculously ignorant view.
You guys are picking out parts of what I said. I think I'm done here. You don't understand what it's LIKE HAVING ORANGE HAIR. YOUR OPINION IS INVALID UNTIL YOU LEAVE AND COME BACK WITH ORANGE HAIR. YOU ARE IGNORANT PEOPLE WHO DON'T RESPECT THE ORANGE. EDUCATE YOURSELF ON THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS BROUGHT ON BY ORANGE HAIR. Please lighten up people. <3
I apologize. I did not mean to start such a heated, emotional argument. I was merely stating my opinion and a bunch of self righteous assholes automatically rebuke it and attack me because I'm "ignorant" when in all reality it's because I don't agree with them. It's dangerous to think for yourself.
174: I should clarify. I was NOT calling you ignorant. I was saying that's an ignorant view. There's a big difference. This isn't a personal thing; we're debating an issue, not your identity. Also, my hair has indeed been orange. It's arguably orange right now. :p
You really need to shut up, seriously. I have a mental disorder, I have a few pretty severe ones. Judging by what you've said, and your self righteous bitching, I'd say you know nothing. Medication worked for you, eh? Well, you probably didn't have a real disorder in that case. It has been shown over and over that medication actually makes mental disorders worse over time, and people in third world countries who cannot afford any medication... Well, okay. People in third world countries who cannot take medication, and have -schizophrenia-, usually go off, get jobs, and have kids. At least, 65%-75% do. As far as America goes, where we lucky bastards have medication, a whopping five percent do well. A study was done that compared a group of people on medication, and a group of people off of medication. They were treated the same way therapeutically. The people off of medication did so much better over time, it was unbelievable, whereas the people on medication became progressively worse. One of my wondrous disorders is a panic disorders with agoraphobia. I've taken medication after medication for that. Some medications made the panicking so much worse, I wouldn't even eat because I was sure I'd choke to death. I've discontinued all medications, for the sake of my brain, and I've been doing better. I can actually go out in public now. Sadly, though, I can only go out with at least one of my best friends with me. If I don't have a best friend with me, being in public is not an option. I've had problems with panic attacks and what not since I was a young child, REAL disorders aren't cured by will power. Going out does not take the panic away, but it can be traumatizing. Do me a favor, when you get a real disorder, and therapy, medication, and support don't help, let us know, and then begin your "Holier than Thou" speeches. Also, red hair is a good color.
I never said that you believed they worked for everyone. Yes, I did compare your illness to mine. I don't need to know much of anything about you to tell you that your illness probably isn't the most severe thing in the world, if it is an illness at all. You should be happy, because you most likely fall under the misdiagnosed category, which means you're obviously sane and pretty well balanced. Medication works for no one. I mean, it does... But when it comes to the medications you would have taken, I can't think of one that was proven to work better than the placebo. Anything and everything you did was based on will power, which is great, and I'm happy for you. However, I've never met a person with a true mental illness that overcame it with a little will power. Of course, that just applies to countries like Brittain, Ireland, America, Canada, etc. The way people are taken care of in those countries is not truly therapeutic. The psychiatrists and therapists don't seem to learn science, they learn what the pharmaceutical companies want them to know. It's all over the Internet, which sounds stupid, yes, but it's also in books, and in studies you can buy from universities, if you have the money. In third world countries, they have some kind of secret. I'd love to know what it is. Perhaps you've figured it out. If so, let me in on it. I know myself and many of my friends would be interested in knowing how to help ourselves, because therapy, medication, and family/friend support hasn't done anything.
Umbreon believes that you should be locked away if you have to be under medication 24/7 , cannot cope without it, and are a serious harm to yourself and others. I HAVE empathy. I try to take a neutral approach but that doesn't come across well to people who are dead-set on what they believe. Your spouts are composed more of shit than mine are. YES DISORDERS ARE PAINFUL. YES I FEEL SORRY FOR THEM. I just so happen to believe that medication should not be taken as a means to cope with a disability. Small amounts of medication and therapy is a more desirable approach. Even better: quit labelling people with disorders. My brother coped just fine until he was diagnosed with ADHD and now can't live without those goddamned pills. If I have a disorder, I don't even want to know because I am doing JUST FINE. Having a disorder doesn't make you special or qualify for special treatment. Yes, it sucks, but everyone has a struggle they must face and it's time to take responsibility and handle yours. (there are exceptions of course, SEVERE imbalances like paranoid schizophrenia. I'm talking minor ones like certain types of anxieties, ADHD, and some high functioning Autism. My 3 year old brother has high functioning autism and is doing splendid with therapy. no pills. at all.) I will continue to come off as ignorant because my opinion isn't the same as yours, therefore I'm wrong.
Oh, as far as being locked away goes... I have been locked away. Three times in 2009, and I was just getting worse with the medication, and the therapy wasn't helping. I don't think I need to be locked away in an institution, because anyone who has been there knows that institutions don't help. I was in Columbia Hospital's Pavilion, and that's a pretty gross place. The floors aren't cleaned, the walls have boogers on them, everything is dusty, and the place is probably two degrees in the summer. A girl was in there because she'd been raped, and went into psychosis, and they had her on all kinds of medication that was way too strong for her. She was puking constantly, but the psychiatrists didn't care. Anyway, when she puked, they wouldn't sanitize the area; they'd wipe it up with a paper towel. She even puked on the tables where we ate, and it wasn't cleaned. And it's not as though there are any therapists on call to talk to. It's funny, truly, because the adult ward and the elderly ward, and the acute care ward were all allowed to smoke cigarettes. I mean, we were in a hospital, full of doctors, and the adults were allowed to smoke. Irony. I've heard I was in a pretty good place compared to my other options in Florida. It's angering, because the staff where I was were pretty shitty, save for two of the day staff. One guy was a fatass, and would eat the food that kids put in the fridge to eat with our later meals, and then he'd scream at us for putting food in there without his permission, even though he wasn't on his shift when the food was placed in the fridge. O_0 Honestly, I think some mental health patients should be euthanized humanely. There are some people that spend 30 years of their lives, sitting in a cold cell, alone, being force fed, while the voices and visuals bombard them. It isn't fair to keep someone alive, when they're living like they're dead.
No, ignorance comes from your ignorance. However, I agree with you. It's harder to function once one has been diagnosed with a disorder, because, from then on, that person is constantly reminded of his disorder. I don't have minor illnesses, by the way. I don't have paranoid schizophrenia (thank whoever), but I do have bipolar, type two, rapid cycling. It isn't the most severe form of bipolar, no, but it comes in second. Thankfully, there was a school about an hour away that I was able to get into when I was in high school. It was a special school for kids like me, and kids who'd been to jail, and kids with traumatic brain injuries. It was also right across the street from a school full of kids that had done somethings that were seriously unethical; lucky us. I was babied there. I had a therapist on call whenever I needed it, I had therapy in school twice a week, all of my teachers were trained to teach kids with special needs, etc. Even better, every day was a constant reminder of what was wrong with me. I was never, ever a normal kid, which seems to be the case for anyone with a disorder of any kind. Outside of school my case manager would visit me once a week, I'd see my private therapist once a week, and my psychiatrist every other week. I revolved my life around my illness, and so did my parents. Every time I acted up, I was told to go take an extra dose of my medication. I function much better away from all of that. I think, if people with disorders were treated more like human beings, they'd be a lot less crazy. There would also be a lot fewer people with disorders, if we didn't all get checks from the government for disability. :|
I'm not a poketard....it just happens to be my screen name. My names at least make sense. D: personal attacks again, what, are we in middle school or something? You can't function properly without constant medication or constant supervision? Hospital. Stop bringing me up mr. military. Picking on a little girl isn't going to get you anywhere in real life. Trying to turn people against me isn't going to do shit. I will SOMEHOW LIVE A NORMAL LIFE, without medication. Stop being so dramatic and lighten up. Life isn't all bad. =D
usmcbunny-You are very blind. You have absolutely no clue how anything works for another person because, you are not everyone. Also, saying that someones illness is not severe is ridiculous. I'm going to go out on limb and say, you don't know Pendatik, therefor you have no clue what he struggles with on any given day. One person may have ADHD and yes it doesn't seem as bad as say, Bi-Polar but, to the person that has ADHD it is very serious and incredibly hard to deal with. You are ignorant. How can you say that medication doesn't work for anyone? Like I stated before, I worked with criminals for a few years and I can assure you that, a vast majority of those people needed medications for their disorders. Have you ever talked with a skitzophrenic, when they're not on their medication? If you have, then you know that medication is (in most cases) 100% necessary. Umbreon-Some of your views are very ignorant because, they're not based around actual facts or life experiences. My brother was hit by a car when he was 3 years old and he has a severe mental disorder and believe me, he has to be on medication around the clock and certainly doesn't need to be locked away. You can't base your opinion on 2 examples. If your friend has bi-polar, there is most likely a lot about that person that you don't know, especially mentally. Bi-polar is a very serious disease and should be treated as such. IJD and Pendatik are spot on. It is so reassuring to know that there are people in this world that still have an accurate view of the world. I applaud you both. :]
usmc: In my eyes, everything you said and will say lost all validity when you brought in euthanasia. Umb's comment that no one should be medicated for a disability comes in at a close second for the stupidest thing I've ever read here, and yes, that even includes double-i-for-every-y person up there. But at least I can excuse her because she hasn't been in this situation personally, and her opinion could certainly change drastically if she did. Honestly, no matter how much you want to think you relate to or know academically about some things, until you've actually gone through similar disorders or disabilities YOURSELF, you cannot empathize. What Umb has is sympathy. That's an extremely valuable thing, and I'm not belittling her for not having shared this experience. I hope she never does. You, however, are coming from a standpoint where you should know better. You have just enough experience, decent ideas, and good grammar to make you SEEM credible, but your fundamentals are way off and your good conclusions are, on closer inspection, snarled up with very dark, disturbing ones. That's worse by far than every lame-ass Soviet Russia and inane sammich joke combined, because your ideas are legitimately dangerous.
umbreon, the reason you are being criticized for your opinions is because they feel you lack the knowledge to back it up. For example, I honestly wanted Obama to be president but detested the supporters who only wanted to vote for him because he was black. They were ignorant and did not do their research. That's what it means to argue against one's opinions. Also, I ask that you not refer to yourself as "a little girl" since you wish to partake in an adult conversation. I understand what you are trying to get at but don't get defensive. You come across as a much more intelligent being when you respond without sniving remarks or TYPING IN CAPS.
#18, The whole point is she suffers with anxiety in social situations. By posting a comment online, these issues are avoided. So, as #22 states, it is not the same. Also bear in mind that sitting on the computer (probably alone in the room) shares none of the characteristics of being out in public.