By Emma-Louise - 20/05/2011 19:46 - France

Today, the only positive thing my ex boyfriend left me was my pregnancy test. FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 392
You deserved it 14 341

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Nothing says "I love you" like abandonment and unpaid child-support.

Babygirl2338 0

i would track him down and make him pay that child support;)


crunchycereal 0

He didn't leave you waffles :(

niiick97_fml 3
crunchycereal 0

He didn't leave you waffles!?!

Forget waffles! He didn't leave you Ben&Jerrys?! What a bastard!

bravesfan112233 0

well he did leave you. if he was that bad, that was positive

comepoopwithme 0

if you really THINK you love a guy, put a condom on it!

carmenm 6

pulling out is not a contraceptive method .. idiot


I can't believe people are forgetting the Golden Rule. Wrap it before you tap it.

xoxbandgeekxox13 3

hahaha! x3 I laughed at that. just thought I'd tell ya

Maybe you should have considered this before you started dating him and stuff. YDI.

schaflava 0

at least you're not positive with hiv

TheBeatlesAreLov 0

Come on man, no glove, no love.

hotscar 3

don't be daft; wrap your shaft

jamila123 5

36 and 44 sane person, but wtf??? ur pic is... ok. who. is. ur. Doctor! I gotta slap him

36 and 44 IS A DUDE. I wonder how many kids he has already that he doesn't know about?

What a stupid ******* comment. You sound like a 12 year, your probably one of those nerds that always talks about chuck Norris...smh

moonglow93 4

dam r yu going to tell him !??

I have a strong feeling he all ready knows.

^^ I believe he didn't leave her because it was positive. The FML has other strong reasons to why he left.

Damn 3 are you going to take a grammar lesson?

OP, this is why we have condoms, birth control, Plan B (morning after pill), & anti-pregnancy implants. YDI for getting pregnant unintentionally when you had several options to prevent it from happening. Congrats! You're now known as an "oops mom"'.

Must resist telling a dead baby joke.....

whats worse than seven dead babies in one trash can? One dead baby in seven trashcans.

metfanatic1986 0

what's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage. xD

how do you make a baby float. take your foot off it's head

RockstarRN 10

Sick and disgusting! If only your mom had done that to you. Ahhh, a girl can wish!

RockstarRN 10

Sad pathetic excuse of human beings with all the dead baby jokes. I can only wish upon you the same tragedy myself and friend have experienced. Remember this post when your child is ripped from you arms you sorry pieces of sh*t!

whats small, black, orange, yellow, red, and crying? a pile of babies on fire :)

I'm only thumbing down these baby jokes cause they're ******* OLD. Seriously, get some new material, I was regurgitating these when I was 9.

koolaidman247 3

haha tried to thumb u up but I accidentally thumbed you down lol

jazziness 12

dead baby jokes aren't funny

what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes before I jump on one...

I have a wicked and occasionally cruel sense of humor, but these jokes are repulsive and they aren't even good ones. Smh.

The first one was kinda like "Lol, I get it" but as I kept reading them they turned into "WTF is wrong with you?"

RockstarRN 10

Ask me if I give a f*ck. You wish you could thumb me!

sounds kinda sexual if you as me "I wish you could thumb me"

beberrr92_fml 0

so sensitive -_- get a sense of reality. you baby joke haters probably go to a scary movie and midway through scream "that's cruel disgusting and unethical! imma sue these film makers who scarred my eyes!!" and that's why there are no good scary movies.

metfanatic1986 0

how do you make a dead baby float? 2 scoops of ice cream, 1 scoop of dead baby, chocolate syrup, and a cherry on top!

168 - No, I love scary movies... but that doesn't mean I love to read these jokes about mutilating dead babies.

alexd10293 0

how do you stop a baby from choking? take ur penis out of its mouth.

iReadFmlsFml 0

So many assholes talking about dead children..... this is just sick, have you no love or shame? RockstarRN has the right idea, madam, I applaud you.

rockstarRN u da best!!!! all sick people out there, talking about dead babies... what if those babies were u????!!!!!!! who will b laughing then????? MEEEEEEEEE

kiaralove53 0
kiaralove53 0

"Virtue itself turns vice, being misapplied, And vice sometime by action dignified." Taken from Shakespeare: things that seem bad can turn good.

Babygirl2338 0

i would track him down and make him pay that child support;)

iReadFmlsFml 0

Thanks for making me laugh :P

damn straight. He probably won't though because obviously he's trash.

MuffyStJacques 0

Doesn't say anywhere that she is going to keep the foetus... >_>

mylifesucks95 0
Unlucky1232 20

geeze what makes u think he abandoned her. granted yeah broke her heart but he doesn't know she's pregnant. I'm pretty sure he's willing to help raise it

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
igpyitl 0

^i agree. why is she happy to birth a baby that has a dead beat dad who probably won't pay child support or contribute to that child's life. OP must be rly freaking out..

Their birth control could have failed, and in that case, it is not her fault. She doesn't deserve to be abandoned by her boyfriend after finding out that she's pregnant. No one deserves that.

It doesn't matter if she takes birth control. If he doesn't wear a condom, he gives her full control to get pregnant or not. Studies have proven it.

missy_lynn012 0

condom could've broken... stop being a douche.

yeah it could have. But studies have proven that girls have full control if the guy isn't wearing a condom. - - and how is that being a douche? A fact isn't being brainless... did you not pay attention in science or health class?

polkadot3155 6

how do girls have control????

TheDrifter 23

She is the only one of the two with the option of medications and procedures to prevent or end the pregnancy after fertilization, therefore it is her choice and responsibility. All that he has a say in is the court hearing on how much child support he pays, and even they aren't likely to listen to him.

caaamilleeee 0

men can get a vasectomy, it's not souly up to the girl. sure, a girl can choose to use the different forms of birth control out there, but there are tons of men who prefer not to use condoms. and then there are tons of girls out there who don't want to or don't have the guts to say they wish they'd use one. you have no idea how this girl got pregnant, so the reasons your stating these facts is beyond me. and why do you care about proving these things you are saying? im sorry but it sounds like you have never been laid. i could be wrong, but it really sounds like it.

either xxguard is trolling or they really are a "know it all" douchebag.

igpyitl 0

you are a mindless douchebag. what you are saying makes no sense. stop getting your statistics from fox news and get your head out of your ass! the father of the child just abandoned the mom and kid and you are defending him?! go **** yourself you sexist cocksucker