Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML
Today, I caught my husband masturbating to porn. I screamed at him and demanded to know why he was masturbating when he has a wife to have sex with. He said, "Because you always reject me?" I was about to yell back when I realized he was right. I'm a terrible wife. FML
Today, after screaming at me this morning, my wife has been giving me the silent treatment. We're trying to get pregnant, but she caught me masturbating, or "reducing my sperm count on purpose" as she called it. I just wanted some harmless fun with some porn, since getting pregnant has made actual sex a chore. FML
Today, my husband walked in on me while I was masturbating and watching porn (yes women do it too). Now he thinks I’m unsatisfied with him or our sex life. All I wanted was a quick release. FML
Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML
Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML
Today, my wife shouted at me for masturbating in the shower, because, "It’s disgusting." She hasn’t touched me sexually in two years FML
Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
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Top comments
Deathhound 27
Why did she say it then?
gunmania0 12
Does no one else think its sort of the wife's fault? You may try and disagree and say that the op is a bad person for watching ****, but he was just a guy that wasnt getting any from his gal.
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Comments (180)
franky114 7
A quick message to everyone. I think we all figured out that she said no because she was angry. So there's no need for each person to say it. If it been said there's no need to say it again unless the point is being argued about.
luccmon 6
Women...
franky114 7
Well that's obvious
jjdominguez 0
Tell her then dnt get mad when I ********** if u dnt wanna have sex tell her tht
JadeWalker 14
aren't you to young to even be talking bout sex? your 13 you honestly have no real say on how a married couple should work. asshole shud have gone to his wife first and not to some fake **** on a screen. she has every right to be pissed off.
ishtarfire1 0
My wife caught me 2 or three times and I got the same response so I keep watching ****.
DMStarsky 0
What a terrible woman.
Ranimal 12
She might be screaming because she's pissed off that you' rather jerk it than **** her. And if she was that mad, obviously she isn't going to give in and **** you right after.
franky114 7
*cough cough* look at 121 *cough*
Black_Cat_13 7
Op, you should always ask first and that includes asking if she wants to watch too. Even if she's busy with something else. If my partner's in the mood but I'm doing paperwork, he'll sit behind me and tease me until I'm done, or just give up. ;-) Second, females watch **** too, people! Get over it. Just because someone indulges in **** once in awhile, doesn't make them bad or mean that their relationship is a failure or even that their partner's not enough for them. From my own experience, I could go at it all day by myself, if I had the time, but I'm not fully satisfied unless I have my guy. And just because you watch **** does not mean that's what you think about when you're with your partner. For those of you that are using the "she's pissed, why would she have sex with you now?" angle; I agree but only because his insensitive gull. It's like a kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar who then asks if he can have one. "Ask and you shall receive." On the other hand, have any of you heard of "angry sex"? Teach him a lesson! Also, a word on "respecting the relationship." It's all about communication. For example, my partner and I cannot have sex at this point in our relationship due to me being a rather petite virgin (yes, I'm female if you haven't guessed) and he being more well endowed than average. I know he gets off on his own and on a few occasions I've told him to go get laid since I'm no help there. Why? Because we TALK. I'm comfortable in my relationship with him and don't feel threatened or pressured. As long as he's safe, everyone involved (me, him, the other female) knows it is purely physical and he only has an emotional bond with me, I dont see this as cheating or being unfaithful but fulfilling a natural need.
decidedlyvague 11
tl;dr
k8izgr8_fml 0
weird. who the hell is okay with their significant other ******* another woman?
knowitall 1
Lots of people. It's called an "open relationship". Google it. Then try "polyamorous" and "swingers" and your mind will be totally blown.
The__Redneck 7
This is when you say "OK" and turn the **** back on right in front of her.
kafir 3
sounds just like my ex. please tell me your wife isnt a busty, insane little redhead named kim. if so, run like hell:)