Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML
Today, I caught my husband masturbating to porn. I screamed at him and demanded to know why he was masturbating when he has a wife to have sex with. He said, "Because you always reject me?" I was about to yell back when I realized he was right. I'm a terrible wife. FML
Today, after screaming at me this morning, my wife has been giving me the silent treatment. We're trying to get pregnant, but she caught me masturbating, or "reducing my sperm count on purpose" as she called it. I just wanted some harmless fun with some porn, since getting pregnant has made actual sex a chore. FML
Today, my husband walked in on me while I was masturbating and watching porn (yes women do it too). Now he thinks I’m unsatisfied with him or our sex life. All I wanted was a quick release. FML
Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML
Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML
Today, my wife shouted at me for masturbating in the shower, because, "It’s disgusting." She hasn’t touched me sexually in two years FML
Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
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Top comments
Deathhound 27
Why did she say it then?
gunmania0 12
Does no one else think its sort of the wife's fault? You may try and disagree and say that the op is a bad person for watching ****, but he was just a guy that wasnt getting any from his gal.
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Comments (180)
JadeWalker 14
obviousely shes gonna say no if shes pissed off at you. ydi it pig. my bf doesnt ever ********** to ****. your pathetic.
beggarman 4
Hahaha. Yes he does.
chavkill 2
I reckon he does lol. Most guys do keeps us happy ya know also means were not begging for pleasure 24/7. Your boyfriend would have to be really boring if he never masturbated either that or you have sex everyday.
joncole 6
Hate women like that
mexicoman101 6
Thats bullshit, she has no reason to get that angry over you watching ****. Then again you cant expect her to put out whilst shes mad at you. The best you can do is apologize but let her know you will be doing that as long as she isnt fulfilling your needs.
lightfiyr 0
Sorry for party rocking
Afonya 2
you should try not to piss your wife off before asking her to have sex.
lizard399 0
"Hey I know I just made you feel bad, and you're upset or whatever but let's do it cause it'll fix my current situation." Yeeaahh.. Sounds wonderful.. Was he expecting you not to be mad anymore?
lizard399 0
He, you, him whatever.. I wrote it this to the wrong person
lizard399 0
Grr.. I'm done typing!
iilovecokee 6
All you men and boys calling his wife a stupid bitch. I can't wait for the day you walk in on your wives/girlfriends masturbating to ****, where the actors dick is twice as big as yours and **** was her first option. That's right, before you. I'm sure she will consider you, but you just won't be a good enough. I can see your below average dicks inverting with insecurity as I type this. And yes, they probably would prefer the actor's dick over yours.
waitnobodycares 6
thumbs up x2000
joa76 3
Except most guys would just find it hot to see her getting herself off, so...
AshleyCole 0
She probably would **** you cuz she was pissed about you jerkin it
crazyclown00 17
Sadly my wife has pulled the same crap as the OP.
TattedDownJah 2
Lmao u know what u do wait till she 's in the shower an come in there an rub one out on her