Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
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Same thing different taste
Rejection erection
Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML
So frustrating!
Today, I caught my husband masturbating to porn. I screamed at him and demanded to know why he was masturbating when he has a wife to have sex with. He said, "Because you always reject me?" I was about to yell back when I realized he was right. I'm a terrible wife. FML
How could you?
Today, after screaming at me this morning, my wife has been giving me the silent treatment. We're trying to get pregnant, but she caught me masturbating, or "reducing my sperm count on purpose" as she called it. I just wanted some harmless fun with some porn, since getting pregnant has made actual sex a chore. FML
Caught red-handed
Today, my husband walked in on me while I was masturbating and watching porn (yes women do it too). Now he thinks I’m unsatisfied with him or our sex life. All I wanted was a quick release. FML
So frustrating!
Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML
Self-service
Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML
Cheating with the showerhead
Today, my wife shouted at me for masturbating in the shower, because, "It’s disgusting." She hasn’t touched me sexually in two years FML
Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML
How very dare you?
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
Top comments
Deathhound 27
Why did she say it then?
gunmania0 12
Does no one else think its sort of the wife's fault? You may try and disagree and say that the op is a bad person for watching ****, but he was just a guy that wasnt getting any from his gal.
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Comments (180)
ZXDriver 0
That sucks. She sounds like a bitch.
JadeWalker 14
you sound like you never get any
perdix 29
Of course, his wife isn't going to have sex with him if she just caught him masturbating to ****, she'll know for a fact that she's just a cum dumpster while he's really thinking of the women in the ****. The OP should learn two lessons about the etiquette of jacking off to ****: 1. When you are horny, give your wife first dibs to relieve it. 2. Don't get caught.
rmeyer6 0
she has no logic
dregg22 2
Ydi I wouldn't want to have sex with you either if I caught you jacking off to some other girl
JinxosGirl87 0
If I was pissed at my significant other about something, the last thing I would want is to have sex with them, especially if I felt betrayed by them. That was obviously the wrong time to ask her for it and I don't blame her for denying him. He needs to respect the relationship if she has problems with him watching ****.
AliCat18 12
if she stops saying no to him then maybe he wouldn't have to watch ****! ihe only asked her at that point in time to make a point
perdix 29
If she has problems with him watching ****, he just needs to be real discreet about doing it ;) See Lesson #2 above.
AnthonyN 5
Blue balls :
nado13579 12
Maybe she didn't want to do it cause she was mad at you.
xxJonaKillsxx 8
Well I'm sure that you kinda killed the mood.....just saying.
ohSNAPyall 26
Why should she work herself up now? OP chose **** over her, and he'd probably finish prematurely at this point. She's probably upset because he ignored her libido.
lilly98ish 4
I dont blame her but I don't blame you she was prob pissed at the moment so no she didn't want to and ask her later lol