Miscellaneous: Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found...

By Anonymous - 30/06/2014 16:19 - United States - Naperville

Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 130

You deserved it 42 717

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Same thing different taste

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By Blueberry - 17/09/2012 02:00 - United States - Iowa City

Today, I was showering at my dorm. I had my clothes locked in a locker and my towel and robe hanging outside the stall. Someone took off with my towel and robe, which had my keys. I had to walk down three flights of stairs to get an extra key in nothing but a plastic shower curtain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 222

You deserved it 2 417

By issy - 21/09/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, while taking a shower in the dorm bathroom, my roommate thought it would be funny to steal my towel, robe, and key. I spent over an hour waiting for someone to come into the bathroom so I could ask them to bring me something to cover up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 688

You deserved it 3 631

By LaundryVictim - 15/06/2016 20:50

Today, I picked up my laundry from the wash-and-fold and proceeded to put everything away. I noticed a hand towel that wasn't mine and made a mental note to return it; turned out they'd given me someone else's boxers as well. My boyfriend doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 574

You deserved it 1 134

By happymum - 30/09/2011 11:10 - Netherlands

Today, I lost my watch at the pool. After giving a detailed description of it at the desk, I was really happy to hear someone had found it and handed it in. Too bad I was too late, because someone had already claimed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 238

You deserved it 2 555

By oh, shit...... - 02/02/2016 20:27 - Denmark - Bagsv?rd

Today, I was at the gym. At the end of my workout, I realised I lost the bundle of keys I had in my pocket that contained the key to my locker with all my stuff. I panic and start looking for them. After an hour of desperate searching, I find them thrown in the bottom of the public toilet. Thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 408

You deserved it 1 988

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 20:25 - United States - Houston

Today, I found out who's been stealing clothes from me during swim practice. She called me a liar, despite wearing one of my sweaters, which has my initials stitched into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 522

You deserved it 2 781

By Username - 13/12/2010 18:10 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk saying "shut the f*ck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 079

You deserved it 4 298

By Lulu - 17/09/2009 02:23 - United States

Today, I was washing some clothes in the laundry room at my apartment complex. I went back an hour later, passed my neighbor on the way in, and moved my clothes to the dryer. I just brought them back from the dryer, and all my underwear are missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 601

You deserved it 3 337

By Anonymous - 18/07/2012 17:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went to the beach with a friend. We'd forgotten to get our towels out of the SUV, so I rushed back to the parking lot. I opened the passenger-side door and climbed in to begin my search. After ten seconds or so, I realized I'd busted into someone else's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 589

You deserved it 6 916

Inappropriate

By Anonymous - 28/02/2019 11:00 - United States - University

Today, I went to take a shower, but forgot my towel and dorm key in my room. After my shower, I had to run down to the front desk butt-naked, using only a shampoo bottle as cover, and ask for a temporary key. The person running the front desk was my ex-girlfriend’s current boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 156

You deserved it 1 092

thomcmoore 23

Tuesday 1 July 2014 0:49

So you left that poor guy high and dry? Well, maybe not dry...

Killz268 18

Tuesday 1 July 2014 0:52

you couldve just asked him if he picked yours up on accident..

Comments

OlePal 8

Tuesday 1 July 2014 2:01

I can't say I wouldn't have done the same thing. Definitely take it back though.

JiveHaddock 1

Tuesday 1 July 2014 2:22

Maybe it wasn't you best choice to tell people. SHHHHHH!

wvcheesehead 13

Tuesday 1 July 2014 2:42

Tell the person it was a joke, maybe they appreciate "dry" humor.

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 1 July 2014 3:06

I've had so many towels stolen I keep mine in the locker room... Honest mistake but I don't think they would care so much

russfml 31

Tuesday 1 July 2014 3:38

Remember, don't forget your towel! I mean it must of started with someone forgetting a towel lol

GentlemanBastard 15

Tuesday 1 July 2014 4:05

Today, I accidentally stole a towel. FML?

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 1 July 2014 4:05

It was probably Ford Prefect that "borrowed" your towel. You just never know when you'll need one. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

andy594328 17

Tuesday 1 July 2014 4:25

Good reference

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 1 July 2014 5:54

Perhaps to you and the one other FML reader who actually got it. Sigh.

too_swift 5

Tuesday 1 July 2014 4:46

haha!

BruinsFTW108 18

Tuesday 1 July 2014 5:16

Words never hurt, next time, try talking before action. YDI

sassy2085 16

Tuesday 1 July 2014 5:28

That is what happened to your towel someone thought you stole and took it back.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 754

You deserved it 3 574

Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 381

You deserved it 4 153

The Top

Today, I was showing my friend's dad an airsoft gun I was hoping he would be interested in buying. It's a pistol worth about 90 bucks. In the midst of showing him, I thought it would be funny to do a fake, upwards "pistol whip". The mag ended up flying out full speed and hitting him in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 931

You deserved it 45 244

Today, I've found that it's hard to focus on important things when your roommate won't stop singing at the top of his lungs, without any music playing mind you, especially when his singing voice sounds like a cat being forced through a meat grinder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 756

You deserved it 80

Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 105

You deserved it 2 573

Today, I’ve been waiting for the girl I love to break up with her boyfriend so I could ask her out. It finally happened; however she said she wanted time to heal before she started getting involved with guys again. I respected that decision. There’s just one problem. I saw her in town, hand in hand with another man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 960

Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 452

Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 826

You deserved it 1 140

Same thing different taste

You ain't seen me, right?

Inappropriate

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